Neko-chan's Pawprints
by Vixen Tail
Summary: A companion fic for Déjà vu no Jutsu, filling in the blanks for certain parts not covered by the main story.
1. Kakashi's Bedtime Story

**Disclaimer** : _Naruto_ and all canon characters belong to _Kishimoto Masashi,_ Eri and Natsumi belong to me.

**Rating** : Err… **T** for now?

**Author's Note** : So as promised, sidestories and shorts from **Déjà vu no Jutsu**. We shall start with Kakashi's bedtime story, because I said so. And a reviewer stuck it in my head… If you have not read **Déjà vu** yet I would strongly suggest so, otherwise you'll be a little lost. Next up should be the Hyūga incident, as that was another requested scene.

Yes, I'll take suggestions or I'll just fill in the blanks between scenes that either weren't included for word cap reasons or because my SI/OC wasn't involved.

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><p><em>Kakashi's bedtime story, as told by Hatake Sakumo<em>

"Just after you were born, I was called away for a short mission." Sakumo quirked a smirk at his son when the four-year-old leapt for his bed, to keep the older shinobi from having to stop in his story to tell him to do so. "I got your nee-chan to watch you and your kaa-chan for the night, even if it was a short mission and I should have been back that same night."

"'Cause you're paranoid." Kakashi chirped at his father, grinning broadly and ducking the swat to the head.

"Who's telling this story, me or you?"

His son blinked grey eyes at him innocently, rearranging his bedding as if that was the only thing he had on his mind.

Sakumo snorted, seating himself on the edge of the bed. "Ninja's are not paranoid, there's only those who do their preparations and those who don't do them and end up dead."

"Get on with it, Otou-sama."

"Fine, I see how much you care for me." When all the younger silver haired boy did was stare expectantly, the elder rolled his eyes back at him. "Your nee-chan thought the same you did, that I was just paranoid, but like any good apprentice she went along with her beloved shishou's orders and guarded you and your kaa-chan for me anyways. For her, it was mostly business as usual… until nightfall."

"When Iwa-nin attacked."

"You're getting a little ahead of me, Kashi-kun."

The young prodigy smiled sheepishly. "You're going too slow."

"When little neko-chan started her perimeter checks for me, an Iwagakure no Sato shinobi snuck up behind her. He was armed with a tantō, and aimed to take her head off to clear his way to your kaa-chan…" Sakumo paused deliberately, smirking at his son's rather less than amused glare for it. "…but little baby Kashi-chan giggled, attracting her attention. Natsumi-chan turned her head, listening to baby laugh at his bath, and caught the sight of the tantō aimed at her neck."

"I was so smart." Kakashi marveled to himself, ducking the second slap at his head for interrupting his father.

"You're nee-chan dove under the swing, snagging the blade she concealed in her ninja sandals and taking out her attacker. You save her life, but the Iwa-nin got her hair."

The four-year-old wrinkled his small nose. "Are you sure? Nee-chan's hair is always been long."

"It was shorn to mid-back later, they had to even it out to shoulder-length the day after." Sakumo informed him thoughtfully. "I don't know why she grew it out again… she always complained about the length."

"Shikaku-sama asked her to."

"Oh…" Blinking as he absorbed that, the kenjutsu master gave his son a strange look. "How do you know that?"

"I _asked_ her."

"Then why ask me?"

Kakashi gave his father a shrug. "I still can't imagine nee-chan with short hair."

"…moving on." Sakumo shook his head as he laughed wryly at himself. "You're nee-chan had just been attacked, cutting her hair but without much other injury dealt with. Alarmed, little neko-chan jumped to the roof and found yet another attacker trying to sneak up on your kaa-chan. Like the little neko she is, Natsumi-chan snuck up on this Iwa kunoichi and managed to take her down with little fuss."

"Two down, two to go."

"Yes, two down. Your nee-chan, having already dealt with the attackers she could find, attempted to call for backup. But that alerted one more attacker, who managed to get into the house while his fellow shinobi tried to kill neko-chan and the kunoichi attempted to find a way in from the roof. That dead kunoichi had with her a short sword, so neko-chan snagged that and then used a window to place herself between Eri-kaa-chan, who held you safe in her arms, and the only entrance that opened into the rest of the house."

"Imagine my surprise when the door opened and it wasn't that last Iwa moron, but taicho himself." The newly married Nara Natsumi interjected from the doorway of Kakashi's bedroom, grinning at both silver haired males. "This story again, Kashi-chan? It's the fifth time this week."

The four-year-old stuck his nose in the air at the assassin. "I like it, that's all that matters."

"Right yes, my mistake." The kunoichi informed him while rolling mismatched, ghost pale eyes at him.

"Neko-chan?"

Natsumi frowned slightly at her kenjutsu master, sheepishly rubbing at her left arm. "Shika's on mission, and it's a bit… lonely at home without him."

Sakumo grinned fondly at the heroine of his son's favorite bedtime story. "You know where your room is, neko-chan."

"Thanks taicho. Gaki, I'll see you in the morning." The Leopard Summoner smirked at Kakashi's protest over being called a brat, flicking her fingers at both of them in goodbye as she wandered a bit farther into the house to her old room.

The smallest Hatake huffed, crossing his arms over his chest and scowling at the doorway. "Nee-chan is awesome, but she's mean sometimes."

"That's true of most shinobi, Kashi-kun." Sakumo reminded his son dryly. "Now, back to the story. Where were we?"

"You just came in, Otou-sama."

"Right. I threw the door open to ensure you three were alright, and your nee-chan pointed the tip of that borrowed short sword at my throat until she recognized me. She was splattered with blood, her hair raggedly short, and scowling fiercely enough that I almost thought something was hurting her."

"But nee-chan wasn't hurt."

"No, she was scared. For you and your kaa-chan, because the attack happened on her watch when she promised me to watch you both when I couldn't be there. She was almost ready to attack me, if I had proved to be that last attacker that got past her guard."

Kakashi nodded firmly. "Which is why nee-chan is awesome."

The kenjutsu master gave his son a small smirk for that. "Indeed. When she realized who I was, and that she had succeeded in keeping you and your kaa-chan safe for me, only _then_ did neko-chan lower her sword. Then, after I checked to ensure you and your kaa-chan were unharmed, she and I went _hunting._"

"Because there was one more naughty Iwa-nin to find."

"Yes. I Summoned Aki-sama to help us, and my Dogs' pack leader faithfully led us straight to him. We found him tucked away in the forest outside the walls, taking advantage of a small window of opportunity they had caused by making the patrol that was supposed to check the area sick with poisons. Your nee-chan attacked first, flushing him out of his position and straight into my grip. When we were done _demonstrating_ our displeasure with him and his fellow Iwa-nin, we dragged him straight to T&I."

Almost cheering at that, the little prodigy wiggled in his spot. "Serves them right for trying to kill kaa-chan."

Sakumo gave him a fanged smirk at that. "I quite agree with you there, Kashi-kun. Once everything was over and our fellow shinobi had a handle on the problem and the cleanup, I picked your nee-chan up and brought her home because by then it was near dawn and we both were tired. Now Natsumi-chan likes to pretend she's a tough little neko, but she's very sensitive to upsetting her important people. She was terrified your kaa-chan wouldn't like her anymore, because she had killed to protect you both and sometimes the civilians don't like seeing that."

"But she was worried for nothing, because kaa-chan still likes her."

"We didn't know your kaa-chan could move past that so quickly, Kashi-kun. Neko-chan's worry was valid at the time." He ruffled his son's fluffy hair, jerking his hand back before the younger Hatake could swat it away. "Neko-chan, that next morning, dithered in her room for a whole hour, worrying about all of it. Eri-kaa-chan finally got fed up with waiting and went to her room, only to hug the young kunoichi before your nee-chan could apologize for it. Bloodstains, short hair, and all."

"Because kaa-chan's awesome too."

"Of course I am, Kashi-kun." Hatake Eri beamed at her son, giving her husband a smile of his own. "Did you know neko-chan's here?"

"Her husband's gone on mission and she was lonely." Sakumo answered his wife fondly. "She's staying over tonight."

"Hmm…" The civilian woman eyed their son, her smile turning mischievous. "If you go straight to sleep, Kashi-kun, I'll see if your nee-chan would consent to teach you a few chakra tricks in the morning."

Kakashi nodded rapidly. "I'll be good, kaa-chan."


	2. The Hyūga Affair

**Author's Note** : I don't really feel like doing the disclaimer thing the whole way through, so since I got it out of the way early we're skipping that part. We are also jumping to **M **rating rather quickly, mind you. Gore and violent things, yay…

The Squirrel Incident is, apparently, next. I finished the next chapter for **Deus ex**, and I think I'm going to stagger updates between these two for the time being. So when I get chapter 34 back I'll start on 35, and after that the squirrel chapter. So it might be awhile. Might.

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><p><em>The Hyūga Affair<em>

Panther decided she didn't like them.

She liked B, don't get her wrong, but these Kumo-nin seemed nothing like the rapping jinchūriki of the eight-tails.

That… and they were preventing her and Minato from being able to go home for the day. She had a three-year-old son to read a bedtime story to, and she was sure her otouto had plans of his own for Naruto's bedtime.

The end of the Third Great Shinobi War had it's own loose ends to tie up, no matter the beat down Namikaze Minato gave Iwagakure no Sato first before becoming the Village Hidden in the Leave's formidable Yondaime Hokage and Konohagakure's beloved Yellow Flash.

Though the man himself will still cringe and flush slightly if you called him any of that to his face.

Fugaku and Hizashi, who had been in control of the Earth war camps near the end, might have had to smash Iwagakure's teeth in when they attempted to throw out or even rout the Sand-Leaf forces camping out on their front lawn but Iwa did fold after their last gambit failed.

Sunagakure was still staunchly pro Konoha, and Kirigakure was a bit swamped with trying to clear out the very last of any rebel Mist-nin factions to cause further trouble. They both were part of an alliance, as well, with Amegakure and now Kusagakure as support.

Bit by bit, Yahiko and Minato were working on that prophesy of their sensei's. Jiraiya got a little sappy when he heard more news about it, every damn time no matter if he heard it once before or not.

Kumogakure was the last of the Great Shinobi Nations that had yet to decide on what to do, either allow hostilities to subside and nitpick for the next few decades or actually attempt what Iwa tried and epically failed to do.

Hence why Konoha currently had a group of Cloud diplomats jawing at their Yondaime and generally wasting time just because they could.

Minato didn't look all that amused either, for that matter.

Apparently Senju Nawaki's fellow but foreign diplomats had some variation of survival sense, because they begged off any further peace talks for the day shortly after Panther had concluded she didn't like them.

The ANBU General wondered if that had anything to do with her slipping into the visible parts of the Hokage's office or not, but shrugged the thought away and turned to her Hokage while slipping her mask off. "Finally, you ready to head out?"

"Thanks for that, sempai." He spoke while rubbing at his left temple, where he usually felt the pain of any headaches his position gave to a kage.

Natsumi sniffed at him, sealing the mostly black cat mask into her belt simply because she didn't intend to do much else before changing back to her usual jōnin uniform. "I have no idea what you're talking about. In unrelated news it's my turn to read Maru-chan a bedtime story so let's go."

Her old kouhai cracked a grin at her for that. "Well, far be it for me to get in the way of my little godson's privileges. Dismissed, Panther-_sama_. I'll see you in the morning."

"Sure you will. It's not like I usually hang around awaiting your convenience, _Yondaime-sama_."

Minato acquired a bit of a sheepish flush at that. "You won't let me meet with non-alliance shinobi without being around to intimidate them for me in the first place, sempai. So I'm putting good money on you showing up bright and early, no matter how much that'll make Shikaku grumble at me."

The former assassin frowned at him. "You know, it kinda sucks when you get anticipated like that."

"Ah, but that's just a measure of how much I both know and rely on you, sempai." Corrected the Yondaime as he got up from his rather comfy couch he used when meeting with foreign dignitaries. "A mark of faith or reliance, if you'd rather."

"I'd think it is more like getting predictable."

"We do not need another Inuzuka riot, sempai."

Natsumi paused, looking back at him before she abused his hiraishin to get home unseen. "Is that an order?"

Minato frowned suspiciously back at her, pausing at his office door. "Why?"

"I'm pretty sure I can think up of something else just as odd and disruptive to annoy you with."

The Yondaime Hokage, Konohagakure's Yellow Flash, the terror of Iwagakure no Sato, planted his face in his hands. "Oh _kami_, sempai. Don't, please."

His ANBU General snickered at him. "Just a suggestion, kouhai."

"Go home and read my godson a bedtime story."

"Sure, as long as you read _my_ godson a bedtime story."

Minato gave her a bastardized salute as he left his office to the ANBU night guard. Natsumi wondered if he realized it had been copied from Fiona's military salute or not.

\V/

"Come _on_, kaa-chan! Hurry up."

"Mmhmm, hurrying. Watch me hurry."

Shikamaru still didn't look at all too pleased with her speed, especially since she had promised him cherry preserves to get him out of the house with her in the middle of winter. Wrapped up in a fluffy coat and the scarf Aikido-baa-sama knitted for him, he was almost too cute to take seriously.

Although Natsumi almost wanted to sulk, because the _damn bloody cherries_ were apparently more popular than one of kaa-chan's rare off days. Yes, she knew full well comparing her popularity in her son's eyes to the treat both he _and_ his father shared a love for wasn't at all fair.

Not the point.

Minato had decided that since the Kumo diplomats wanted to just stall for a few days she didn't need to be there constantly, some of Stag's guards would do just as well. Then the ass had made it a point to bring up the lack of time the both of them had to spend with their children since this crap started, and stated that since he was restricted until they decided how they wanted to do this she shouldn't have to miss out on more of Shikamaru's growing years than she already had.

Which resulted in Panther-sama being forced to give Stag the lead in what guarding their Yondaime needed within the village.

Since Natsumi had the time, she rather did want to spend it with the heir she bore Shikaku. Her son was adorable, no matter what little scrunched up face he made being called so. The fact she needed to do a grocery run was just life, because eating was part of that no matter how much their son would rather nap.

It was the actually _doing_ something that Shikamaru didn't really all that like when spending time with kaa-chan. He would much rather take a nap with her and his father instead of expending energy to do something else no matter how fun he found it.

Natsumi blamed Shikaku. Their next child had better _not_ be as lazy.

The Uchiha compound gate guards looked pretty amused at her second trip out there that same week. She gave them an old fashioned look that merely made them smirk at her.

When Shikamaru got behind her and tried to push when she stopped and signed into their compound one actually cracked a laugh.

Instead of bearing more knowing looks and little laughs, after writing down Shikamaru's name she plucked her clan's heir up into her arms and jumped for the roofs.

At least she had a way to get this over with quickly.

Shikamaru squirmed out of her hold the moment they touched down, scampering to the Uchiha run shop as fast as his little legs would pump. "Madoka-baba!"

"Well, if it isn't the young Shikamaru-sama!" The elderly woman beamed at the young Nara, switching targets to his mother. "Natsumi-sama, _again?_"

"What can I say? Apparently it's better than naps."

"High praise indeed, coming from a Nara." She seemed pleased with that, though, slipping a few jars of the cherry preserves the Nara clan's head and heir loved so into a box for secure and safe handling. "Do you think you can carry it all, Shikamaru-sama?"

The three-year-old might be dwarfed by said box, even as small as it was, but he nodded rapidly and took it from her.

Then balanced it on his head and peered up at his mother with their shared eye coloring to ensure she paid Madoka for his treat.

Natsumi had to look away before she laughed, handing the elderly Uchiha the ryo to cover the expense of the preserves. "I am sorry to bother you again this week, Madoka-san. Really."

"It's fine, Natsumi-sama. I must say this is rather flattering, to say the least."

The ANBU General at least got her change back before the next upset to her rare off day happened.

She didn't catch the _thump_, but she did hear the alarms around the Hyūga clan go off.

Sighing, she gave her son a slightly regretful look. "Maru-chan, I'm really sorry kiddo. I've got to go in, someone apparently wants to be naughty."

Shikamaru was almost upset enough to drop the box of preserves, which made Natsumi feel slightly better about getting forced to use them as a bribe to get him out of the house willingly. "What? No, kaa-chan! I'm sorry, I won't ask for more again!"

The former assassin saved said box, giving her son a hug and looking up at the alarmed old woman. "Can you take him to Mikoto's for me? I should really report in and see what Minato wants done."

"Of course, Natsumi-sama. I'll wait with him if Mikoto-sama's not in." Madoka accepted the box and the three-year-old who scowled cutely at getting his day with mom interrupted no matter the trouble he gave her for it.

"Thanks." She gave her son a ruffle of his little fluffy ponytail in goodbye before bolting out of the shop and up to the roofs, quickly sighting in on what seemed to be so wrong the invasion alarms rang.

Someone had decided to make a few new doors in the Hyūga compound, apparently. She could see the holes from where she was, and the Uchiha compound was nearly on the opposite side of the village using the Hokage's Tower as a guide point. Confused and a little wary Natsumi made her way there, joining a few other shinobi on their way to the disturbance to either lend a hand or to ensure it wasn't really an invasion before reporting in to whoever they reported to in case of emergency.

There was a ruin of a man getting tended to by a severe looking Hyūga iryou-nin, and Minato was giving some rather sharp but low sounding orders to Shikaku and Inoichi.

What attracted the former assassin's attention was the near _murderous_ rage on Hiashi's face.

Fugaku was talking to his fellow clan head in a low voice, but when Natsumi touched down nearby it apparently hadn't been enough for whatever had pissed off the Hyūga clan head.

…or so she thought.

Surprise hugs were more than a little awkward, especially from a man that seemed to scream '_don't touch me_' in vibrant, thunderous colors.

Now vastly confused, the Nara's Lady very slowly patted the shinobi on the back. "…what?"

"The cribs, Natsu." Shikaku informed her, unhelpfully ignoring that another man had hold of his wife. "The ones you carved and sealed? One went off."

"Oh… _well_… okay. Hiashi, _breath_. That's… _apparently_ why I did it. Of course, I really thought they would never be used and Inoichi would harass me about paranoia and extreme preventative measures for the rest of our damn lives, but still."

Said Yamanaka clan head scratched the back of his head sheepishly. "Yeah… listing this as justified paranoia. _Again_. And never bringing it up, ever again. I swear, Natsumi."

"Sempai… would you mind making that seal pattern standard?"

"What, like Konoha standard? Sure, if you want me to. I think maybe reducing the force behind it, though, given the holes through Hiashi's poor home."

"No." Hiashi denied quickly, still rather desperately holding onto the fūinjutsu master that had prevented his heiress from coming to harm. "I find the countermeasures almost too benign."

"Agreed." Fugaku chipped in, much to their collective surprise. He was still eyeing the three walls the interloper had been thrown through with a very flinty look, probably comparing what would happen if anyone tried grabbing his nine-year-old freshly genin ranked heir or his three-year-old youngest out of their second story bedrooms.

"Koharu-sama wasn't all that pleased, mind you. For mass use, I may have to." Natsumi patted Hiashi on the arm and slipped loose. "I'll check the seal before I go, to see if it's rearmed itself or not."

Surprise hugs from a murderously irate Hyūga warrior was more than a little unnerving, to say the least.

She cast the bloody wreck that ran afoul of her seal work a dismissive glance. "Will he live?"

"Barely."

That was apparently Hyūga iryou-nin code for 'fuck him' and 'I don't care'.

However, it was good enough for them.

Fugaku nodded sharply. "I will have him taken to T&I for you, Inoichi."

"Don't dirty your hands," Natsumi snapped her fingers and got Stag's former ROOT kids to appear before them, "dump him in whatever cell is free, and ensure he doesn't die in the meantime."

Little Geko and her partner Falcon gave their ANBU General a nod, waiting for the medic to finish sealing the worst of the man's injuries.

"Hiashi, how's Hisana? I know Hinata-chan's okay, because my seal wouldn't have gone off without her inside, but what about your wife?"

That question got the Hyūga clan head's attention, and the man blinked silvery eyes at her blankly.

Natsumi sighed and resigned herself to awkward Hyūga hug number two.

\V/

Minato gave the little leader of the Kumo diplomats a frigid smile. "I'm sorry, can you repeat that?"

"Yoshida Tachibana is one of our most respected jōnin. I refuse to believe he attempted such a thing, especially since we are in the middle of peace talks." The shinobi repeated snottily, glaring with a visible measure of irritation at the kage of Konohagakure no Sato. "You must lie, I demand to see him or we shall report to our Raikage that you have not only fabricated a slanderous story to try justifying holding one of his most trusted shinobi hostage but are refusing to meet reasonable demands."

"Mmm… I thought that was what you said." Konohagakure's Yellow Flash spoke almost pleasantly, still with that icy smile. "Allow me to clear the air. No."

The wordy little asshole spluttered.

"Not only was this Tachibana-san caught red handed in his attempt of bloodline theft, he also dealt a fair bit of damage to the Hyūga clan compound when he ran afoul of their security measures around the clan's heiress. Then we found him bleeding out at the end of that damage. Obviously, either he had full permission to try such a thing from your Raikage or didn't care what the consequences were. Once Yamanaka Inoichi is through with him we will decide both his fate and if we wish to continue the war, and grind your village to dust just as we have Iwagakure no Sato."

The Yondaime Hokage's wintery smile turned more than a little sharp.

"You have best hope we don't continue the war, for you and your team here will be the first casualties. If so, Hiashi has demanded the right to your blood for the insult you dealt him and his by attempting to grab his daughter. A dispatch with both a report and the evidence is already on it's way to our country's Daimyo, he will weigh in if he wishes to see more war or not with this latest upset. You have a week, under the ever so pleasant guard of my ANBU forces. If I were you, I wouldn't annoy them as they're not happy with you at all."

Panther almost wanted to snort, because Stag's guard shift rotations was approaching stupidly redundant and it was _only_ the day after.

The older ANBU agents flatly refused to complain, because the thought of their Panther-sama's son might being one of those attempted for next made them all want to be on the guard shift that caught such a thing. The younger ranks were confused but followed along, because it was a kidnapping attempt no matter how you looked at it and Hyūgas were a clan to be proud of.

Even if the seals Natsumi had inked nearly five years ago prevented more than a glance or two from being stolen of little Hinata-hime.

The blue haired little princess of the Hyūga clan was adorable, tiny and dainty like her mother but with her father's looks. She had been a little bewildered as well, at the flying man that crashed through her nursery walls for no apparent reason.

Minato finally got the so called diplomats kicked out with little more fuss made, mostly by Panther handling ejecting the lot out via Wombat and a squad of Stag's finest.

Finally alone, the man sighed heavily. "Fantastic."

"Well… it could be worse…"

Her Hokage gave her a confused look. "How?"

"He could have actually gotten his hands on little Hinata-hime." Panther shrugged, waving one armored hand at him. "We could have no suspect in custody, or may even have lost the Hyūga heiress completely for a day or two."

Natsumi wondered if she had known about this… but she couldn't recall if she had or if she really was just that paranoid.

She was betting on the latter, though.

Eri and Kakashi had been a close enough scare for her, thanks.

"Though… if it's all the same to you, I kinda want to take that week we have to wait for the Daimyo's response and coddle my son."

"That is a very attractive thought, isn't it?" Minato agreed, but cast a rather dark look at his waiting paperwork. "I wish."

\V/

The Daimyo of the Land of Fire apparently wished to prevent another theater of war from being taken on, no matter his faith that the Leaf would accurately display his displeasure with Lightning Country and the Village Hidden in the Clouds. He and the people of Fire Country were apparently tired enough of war to not wish to deal with it.

Read; embargo and hinder them but don't get into a fight just yet.

Minato was almost cheerful as he reminded the remaining Kumo-nin that all overland trade routes normally went through Konohagakure no Sato, and if possible his shinobi would gleefully hamper any attempts to use them for any Lightning Country merchants until their Daimyo or Raikage could come up with something to appease the Fire Daimyo for his ninja's attempt to steal a little girl from both her family and village.

Oh, and good luck with that.

"I'm fully of the opinion that Kumo-nin are the type you have to punch in the face a few times before they behave." Natsumi informed her husband dryly, dishing Shikamaru more rice from the bowl on the table.

Shikaku cracked a smirk at that, even if the situation had given him all sorts of worries and stress while they were trying to deal with it.

"Like Sasuke-kun?"

Natsumi blinked at her son, who blinked back with their matching eye coloring innocently. "How?"

"He stole Ino-chan's bird. So Naru-kun hit him with his stuffed frog. To get it back." Shikamaru shrugged lazily, pouting at the extra mom insisted he eat before getting his cherry preserves. "Sasuke-kun got him back later. Throwing his peas at him when we were eating lunch."

Whose turn had it been to watch the kids last time there was something going on?

…Tsume's, never mind. That would be proper behavior as far as an Inuzuka was concerned.

"Then yeah, like Naru-chan and Sasuke-kun… I guess."

Now why did that make her want to laugh?


	3. Sleep Deprivation Training

**Author's Note** : There is now a list, on my profile, which lists what has been requested so far and a loose order of what may all appear here. We've got a bit under twenty topics planned on so far… and I may have forgotten to add any, so suggest away even if you asked once before. I'm sometimes easily distracted…

This takes place between Parts Four and Five, just before the formal hiraishin seal testing and after the night Minato shows it off to Jiraiya and Natsumi.

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><p><em>Sleep Deprivation Training (AKA The Squirrel Incident)<em>

Jiraiya grinned at his old genin students, getting three wary looks in return. "Guess what?"

"You've finally found a girlfriend?" Inoichi asked dryly.

"That would be if the world was ending, Inoichi-kun." Natsumi informed him blandly, edging behind the exasperated Minato to put him between her and their old jōnin-sensei. "This is more like he found a new onsen to peep on type glee, so probably not that."

"True." Mused the Yamanaka heir aloud, rubbing at his chin as he thought. "So probably not something he's found so much as something else he's going to force us to do he thinks is fun?"

His fellow blond rubbed his face, giving the both of them a sigh. "Maybe we should just ask sensei in the first place?"

Inoichi and Natsumi blinked at him, then looked at the long-suffering expression on the Toad Sage's face as he listened to his former Team Seven members discuss his possible motives.

"Not as much fun." The kunoichi opinioned to her fellow psychology enthusiast with a shrug.

Inoichi nodded in agreement a few times. "So true."

"Sensei," Minato asked of their old team leader loudly, "what did you want?"

"And you gakis wonder why I dropped the damn team."

"Not really, we all know you did it so you'd have a greater range outside the village." Natsumi corrected blandly. "But we do appreciate the vote of confidence in our being annoying skills."

Jiraiya seated himself with a huff, expertly smoothing his amused smirk to a semi-indignant expression. "Moving on since we only have a little time to do this in, what's the longest you three can go without sleep?"

Both Minato and Inoichi blinked at him, but it was Natsumi that gave him an actual figure.

"Thirty-eight hours, forty if I stretch it while ignoring the pain and the sloppiness I tend to get that far in." With a shrug, the little kenjutsu user sat herself down next to him. "I can do a two-day stretch if I do get enough sleep the night before. Possibly, anyways. I used to be able to do two and a half days, before. I might get there again after I'm fully grown."

"How do you know that?"

She scratched at the side of her face sheepishly, not looking at Minato as she answered him. "Nightmares. Sometimes those don't let me go back to sleep in time for morning… and there were a few bad days back in the academy I didn't really want to sleep and suffer through those. So… yeah."

"So you're good enough at it to not worry about." The sannin thankfully acknowledged with only a nod, turning to the two shinobi on the team that didn't know their own limits in sleep requirements as they took seats as well. "Sleep deprivation is just something you're going to have to experience a few times to figure out how much you're good for after a certain point. There's no guarantee you'll have a safe place to rest on longer-term missions, so knowing how far you can go before that will let you plan around it."

"Unfortunately, there's only one real way to know how much tolerance you have for it." Natsumi continued for the man, a very dry smirk pulling one side of her lips up. "And that's by doing it a few times."

Jiraiya patted her on the head, mostly obnoxiously to get back at her for her half of the prior conversation and part in thanks. "So while you'll have to figure it out on your own, I can at least help you start."

Minato gave both their old jōnin leader and his sempai a considering look. "What aren't you telling us?"

"Sleep deprivation affects everyone a little differently." The Toad Sage claimed airily, pinching his fingers together to show a slight amount of space between them. "First time you do it, it's advised to have someone watch you just in case."

The assassin of their old team heaved a sigh. "I'll take Minato-kun and you watch Inoichi-kun?"

"Probably for the best." Confirmed Jiraiya, giving both fourteen-year-old ninjas in question a considering look. "I've arranged Training Grounds Seven to be cleared for the next three days, because that's as long as I can go for. Meet up there tomorrow morning, then we'll waste time until someone knocks out."

The sannin gave each of them a ruffle of their hair before getting up to leave, smirking at both Inoichi's and Natsumi's sour looks for messing up their hair. Minato kept his shaggy and somewhat short just because of that, and the brat only grinned at the both of them in return for the irritated looks.

"Sempai… nightmares?"

The chūnin kunoichi sighed at him, raking her fingers though her hair to re-gather up the strands to tie up again. "Those are just… something that might never go away, Minato-kun."

"Shikaku-kun will help." Inoichi informed his fellow blond when she refused to say more, ignoring her strange look for the comment. "They seemed to get better when we were on mission, anyways."

Natsumi pursed her lips, wondering why he refused to meet her eyes if they were just talking about her new fiancée.

Minato looked between them both, but finally shrugged as he got to his feet. "If you both insist, then okay. What should we plan for this, anyways?"

"Whatever keeps you awake." The ghost eyed kunoichi informed him slowly, still confused over the prior topic. "Books in your case, kouhai. I'm not totally sure about Inoichi-kun, but some of his family scrolls might not go amiss. We're going to have a whole lot of time to waste waiting for this to happen. I'll bring some black teas, the caffeine will help. Leave anything physical you wanted to try for later in the night or the next morning, exercise does help to keep one awake."

"Some of my fūinjutsu designs?" Asked the youngest chūnin there, still thinking it all over as he pulled her upright.

"Probably might help you." Natsumi agreed slowly. "I wouldn't plan on working on them much later on when your thought process gets a bit fuzzy, so do whatever you want to do with that early on."

"Damn, that means we're going to have to listen to them about it all day." Inoichi grumbled, glaring at the kunoichi for agreeing. "You suck."

"So?"

The Yamanaka heir blinked blankly at her. "What?"

"So what if I suck? You lick."

It took a few more moments for the two shinobi to understand, and while Minato went a little green Inoichi went brick red.

Natsumi smirked at their disgusted faces. "What?"

(ooo000ooo)

Though both Inoichi and Minato managed to see dawn's break, a full twenty-four hours awake, by mid-morning both were showing a little more strain than usual.

"Five ryo on Minato-kun falling first."

"Meh… Inoichi-kun." Natsumi countered dryly, rubbing at her left blue eye tiredly. "My kouhai's done less in respect to energy conservation, while Inoichi-kun's done a bit more just to keep himself awake."

Jiraiya hummed at that, swiping a block of sushi from her disposable plate of them. "So, nightmares neko-chan?"

Sighing, the assassin dumped the rest of her snack on his knee in order to stretch out a bit more. "I'll tell you the same thing I told the boys, sensei. That might never really go away."

"What are they about?"

"Same damn shit as before. Gets a bit more interesting sometimes, though." She corrected herself after a moment, thinking about her last set of them. "Mostly of how it ended, but occasionally I get new variations of my friends dying the same damn way I've killed others or how I did back then. Inoichi-kun claims Shikaku will help me, though I'm of the opinion that might just give me a bit more time between bouts of nightmares."

The sannin accepted that easily enough, casting a glance where the blond in question was situated. Inoichi had given up reading for the time being, probably because he caught himself drowsing over his clan's scrolls a few minutes ago. Instead, the young shinobi was running through a variation of what Natsumi wanted to call calisthenics.

"They are getting better though, right?"

"Little by little, yeah." She answered him, wondering what it was Minato was pouring over so intently.

Inoichi lasted until about midday, earning the assassin a few ryo and making the Toad Sage grumble.

While Jiraiya took Inoichi to the Yamanaka clan to get cared for, Natsumi wandered over to where her kouhai was inking something on fūinjutsu paper. "What are you doing, anyways?"

Minato didn't really answer, merely humming to show he heard her talking.

Well used to his habits and thought process, the reincarnated soldier merely took a seat across from him and tried to decipher the wet ink. As far as she knew fūinjutsu, which wasn't a whole lot that wasn't basic, it looked to be a storage seal… mixed with a very convoluted chakra storage seal.

She blinked a few times, confused, and took another long look at it.

"…the hell?"

Setting down the brush he had been inking the lines with, Minato glanced up at her with a questioning look. "What?"

"The fuck is this for?" Natsumi twisted her head, but it still didn't make any sense to her. Wondering if she should brush up on her sealing skills a bit more than she wanted to develop those, she pinned him with an irritable look to prompt him into explaining this to her.

"Well, I had a thought… and wondered if it wasn't possible to seal something living in a storage scroll. You can do it with things like fresh fruit, and it stays fresh for a bit longer than normal. Why not with a person?"

Blinking at him a few times, the assassin wondered if the exhaustion had melted both his brain and her ears. "Kouhai… I think someone would have at least tried that by now if it was. Additionally, fruits are not alive."

"I know that," he gave her a dismissive flap of the hand, still inspecting his work to ensure it was how he wanted it, "but what if it's only an energy thing? Would that allow us to seal shinobi and unseal them past certain points?"

"What, like we can do with extra weapons?"

"Something like that."

She was pretty sure she wasn't following his thought process very well, but since that wasn't exactly uncommon she dismissed that. "Well… most living things need air to survive."

"I accounted for that… there."

Natsumi peered at what he pointed at, wondering if it was just her eyesight or his brush skills that kept her from understanding that snarl of inked lines.

"Err… okay… so then… _how_ the hell is that going to work?"

"Well, storage seals have their own pocket of space. So why not have that space be utilized to support a living creature? I expanded the dimensions and included a pocket of air to be sealed at the same time, meaning as long as the seal is active it should keep something living alive enough to be unsealed at a later date."

She blinked at him, and then again when that still didn't make any sense to her. "…what?"

"Trust me, sempai." Minato informed her airily, rolling up the mostly dry fūinjutsu design.

Well, he did decide to specialize in space-time sealing…

Space?

Didn't bad things happen to living creatures in space? Space was a vacuum, right?

Natsumi blinked blankly at the ground as she pondered that, and again when she realized Minato couldn't be on his way to Jiraiya to get his design looked over. The sannin had taken Inoichi and left for the Yamanaka clan less than a minute ago. Looking around didn't reveal where her blond almost-brother was in the part of the training grounds they had decided to waste time in.

"Mother_fucker_."

(ooo000ooo)

Minato was pretty damn surprised to be seized by the shoulders and wrenched around in order to be inspected. "Sempai?"

"For _fuck's_ sake, Mina. Don't _do_ that to me." She shoved a hand through her hair, ignoring that it fell down because of her action. "You still have that stupid seal, right? Let's go get sensei to look it over before you test it."

"Oh, that's not necessary." He reassured her, not entirely sure what had alarmed her so. "I already did."

"What, took it to sensei? How? He's not back yet."

"No, I tested it."

Natsumi stared at him.

Minato grinned brightly in return. "We just have to wait and see now, if the squirrel lives or not."

"Squirrel?" She repeated blankly, then held up her left hand and curled her thumb and pointer finger to her palm. "Mina? How many fingers am I holding up?"

"Six? Wait… since when do you have six fingers, sempai?"

"Right… you'll thank me in the morning."

"What-"

He didn't say much more after she punched his lights out.

\V/

"Do I want to know why Minato-kun has such an impressive shiner?" Jiraiya asked the next day, when the two of them caught up with him about how long Minato could go without sleep.

Natsumi blinked up at him, then at the chūnin in question. "He did something stupid."

"You still haven't told me what something stupid I did." Minato pointed out a little sourly, rubbing at his black eye.

She was going to excuse him for the tone, because it was only the day after their sleep deprivation training and so he probably didn't have enough rest to be somewhat pleasant. "Yes, well… here. Take a look."

Master and apprentice both looked over the seal she spread out between them on the Toad Sage's kitchen table, a slight flush crawling up the blond's face and an amused smirk sliding across the white haired sannin's the longer they considered it.

Natsumi still couldn't make heads or tails of the seal, and she could usually rather easily read fūinjutsu her kouhai wrote out for her. She didn't know what the both of them were looking at, but she privately bet it still didn't make much sense to either of them either.

"That _is_ your handwriting, Minato-kun. Damned if I can read this, though."

Natsumi's fellow chūnin squirmed slightly in place, trying and probably failing to understand what the design was for. "Err… sempai, did I tell you anything about this?"

"You had a theory for a storage seal for living creatures… then ran off and tested it before I could catch up." She informed him archly, still somewhat irritated at the scare he gave her. "Supposedly, there's a squirrel in there."

"Supposedly." Jiraiya repeated, looking highly dubious over that claim. "Is it alive?"

"I haven't checked it yet, but probably not." Natsumi rolled her mismatched eyes at Minato's less than pleased look for the supposed slight against his ninja specialty. "Bit of a physics lesson for you both, _space_ is a _vacuum_. A storage seal is supposedly a dimensional pocket of nothingness, right? Even a few _thousand_ gallons of air probably won't remain together in any concentration useable to support a living, breathing creature with. Odds are, your squirrel is a frozen mass of gore right now."

"Well, there's a way to find out for sure." Jiraiya informed them both after a moment of processing her tidbit of information. "Go ahead Minato-kun. See what state your squirrel is in."

"It's _not_ my squirrel." He muttered, but obediently reached out and funneled a bit of chakra into the inked lines while swiping a sliced finger over it.

It belched up bloody clumps of flesh and fur in return, all of which was still smoking slightly.

"…right, you said something else about energy I didn't understand at the time."

Minato opened his mouth, then closed it after a silent moment.

Jiraiya blinked rapidly as the scent of burned fur reached them. "Err… I'm going to open a window. One moment."

"You know… there might be a market for that." Natsumi offered after another long moment, when it seemed as if the Toad Sage wasn't coming back until they cleaned it up. "If you can figure out how to keep everything from imploding, a seal that would cook your food while you travel would be rather convenient."

"Not helping, sempai."

"Was I supposed to?" She sidestepped the halfhearted swat to the arm, giving him a cheerful grin. "Well… how about no fūinjutsu when sleep deprived?"

Minato glanced at her, then back to the bloody mess on Jiraiya's kitchen table. "Err… thanks?"

"Right, well. Not it."

He gave her another look.

"What? I'm not cleaning that up, it's _your_ squirrel."

"_Not_ my squirrel, sempai."

The assassin heaved a sigh at him. "I'll stop calling it _your_ squirrel if you don't give me grief about the black eye."

"Alright."

"I'm still telling Inoichi-kun about this."

Minato rubbed his face with his left hand. "You know what? No, if I have to clean the damn thing up you're not telling Inoichi-kun. I don't want to know what he'll think of this."

"You have a deep seated resentment for tree climbing rodents?" Natsumi offered blandly, inching away from him.

"Sempai…"

"No, wait… you have an irrational hatred of cute and innocent forest creatures, and took the opportunity to extract a bloody vengeance upon them. Whatever did the poor squirrel do to you that deserved that, kouhai?"

Her fellow chūnin gave her a flat stare.

"Once I'm married, remind me to never invite you over. I'm not sure if the Nara deer herd could survive it."

He opened his mouth, probably to tell her off, but rethought whatever he was going to say. Then he gave her a bright if chilly smile. "Well… it _did_ seal a squirrel. I think it may need a human test subject, sempai."

"…and that's my cue to leave. Have fun with your bloody squirrel chunks."

"It's _not_ my… never mind."


	4. Hinata's Bedtime Story

**Author's Note : **Not quite on the list, but oh well.

* * *

><p><em>Hyūga Hinata's Bedtime Story, as told by Hyūga Hiashi<em>

"Once, long ago, there lived a warrior woman. She was strict but fair, a competent leader of warriors fighting for the safety and security of her home in a foreign land."

The tiny, four-year-old, blue haired heiress of the Hyūga clan gazed up at her father, wide-eyed at this new story. She hadn't heard it before, and she wondered why he hadn't told this one yet. "What was her name, Otou-sama?"

Hiashi gave his daughter a small smile. "It does not matter anymore, little hime. For you see, one day she died."

"Oh!"

"But death was not her end. She somehow managed to survive her own death, though the how escaped her. She was reborn again, in a new form and place. However, she could recall her last life," the Hyūga clan head's slight smile turned a little bitter, recalling how the ANBU General had once been in person compared to how she was now, "and for the longest time all she could recall of it was the death that had been dealt to her men and herself."

Hinata blinked her mother-of-pearl eyes up at her father, sad for the woman in the story.

"That reincarnated warrior spent years alone, surrounded by other children but unable to connect to them through her grief. Until one boy with gold hair approached her and asked to be taught her warrior skills, for he wished to be a warrior as well. This once ancient warrior woman agreed, for aiding those that asked her for some was ingrained into her. So she taught him her skills, taught him to fight and think as a leader of warriors should."

"Then she had a friend then, right?" The tiny heiress, still young by any standard of judging age, clasped her hands before her, hoping that was true. "She had to be so lonely like that."

"Not quite yet, daughter. That young man learned to fight from her, and introduced her to his friends so they could learn from her as well. She was not enthusiastic of the idea, but consented because she _was_ lonely. The six other friends of the golden haired boy became suspicious of her, for she knew more than any child she appeared as should have."

"But she was teaching her skills to the young boy." Hinata protested on behalf of the story's heroine, a slight frown on her lips. "Why would they doubt her?"

"Because they were supposed to be children, and she did not always act like one." Hiashi informed her calmly, if a little sadly. "They even got the first young man to start questioning his sempai, who merely continued to teach him as if she had not noticed the questioning glances. One day, they decided to confront her about it."

"How rude."

"Yes, yes it was… although at the time they did not know that. They merely wished to ensure she was not an enemy of their home, or someone that wished them harm. The reincarnated warrior informed them of the reason why, just as bluntly as they asked her. The seven young men who doubted her were appalled, once they verified what she spoke of was true. However, they all reacted in different ways."

The tiny Hyūga heiress nibbled on her bottom lip in confusion, paying close attention even if she didn't understand why she was being told this story.

"The golden haired young man found the source of the experience his sempai taught from, and vowed to both learn as best as he could and be there for the ancient warrior as her friend. The oldest friend decided the reincarnation was a good source of advice, and treated her as a strict but reliable advisor if he needed it. The younger three decided to try to help her, for they had skills that would enable that. The last two, brothers that had shared everything in their lives before, decided to treat her differently. The otouto set out to befriend her, but the nii-san was unnerved by what she had gone through and distanced himself."

"Well… at least she now had some friends."

The father of the young girl smiled slightly at her. "Fast forward a decade and a half, and those friends were all grown up, again in the case of the ancient warrior woman, and had families of their own. The golden haired young man had become a leader in truth, his sempai his trusted second he relied on. The oldest friend protected their home for them all, as he was destined to do. Those three younger friend had their own responsibilities as warriors and families, one of the young men actually taking the warrior woman as a wife, and the two brothers served the golden one as trusted warriors. They had added more friends and lost a few beloved people, but they still protected one another and relied on the others if they needed to."

Hinata beamed at that. "That sounds nice, Otou-sama."

Hiashi quirked a fond smile. "It is. Now, at this point of the story, they all had their own skills and abilities and traded them between each other freely when needed. That golden haired leader of warriors and the ancient warrior woman both specialized in an arcane skill, which relied on ink and power to work. The man specialized in using it as a weapon while the woman specialized in protection. She was also a very formidable woman who loved children and dreamed of having her own someday. Knowing this, her friends had her protect their own until she had her dreamed for children."

"Otou-sama?"

"Just a little longer, daughter, and you will understand."

Hinata nodded calmly, settling back into her seated position. "Of course Otou-sama."

"Because of being asked to guard her friend's children, the ancient warrior woman wondered how she would stretch her guard wide enough to protect all her friend's children when she finally had her own. Her wondering brought to mind both her new and old skills. Her arcane powers of protection and a skill taught to her by her otou-san in her last life, that of carving wood. She combined the two, and crafted cribs that would protect any child set inside one."

She blinked her pearly eyes up at him, then snuck a glance at her own bed. She knew, from a situation nearly a year ago, that her bed protected her from a kidnapping attempt. Hinata wondered if this story was more than her father was not implying.

Hiashi knew perfectly well where his daughter was looking, and continued to draw her attention back to him. "That nii-san among the friends had only just renewed his contact with the ancient warrior woman, after avoiding her out of unease for nearly a decade out of his own disturbed feelings for what she had thrived through. She had been a good friend to his otouto, and did not hold his avoidance against him. Because she did not hold it against him, she gifted another of those protected cribs to him as well."

"That was kind of her." Claimed the Hyūga heiress, rapidly running the names of everyone she knew might have been the ancient warrior woman through her mind. She wondered…

"Kind… and it also save that nii-san's first child when someone tried to steal her from her home less than three years later." He smiled down at her, and the puzzled look she wore trying to figure the story out. "However, before such a thing happened someone else tried to attack that golden haired leader's new family. That ancient warrior fought to prevent that, but in the fullness of the fight she sacrificed that part of herself that was ancient to seal away a great demon before it could threaten their home."

Hinata gasped out of horror, wide eyes on her father's slightly sad smile.

"She survived, if only just. However, the events of how just she survived and the changes from that may never be fully known to her friends and family… or even herself. All that made the nii-san feel worse about his avoidance, knowing she had no way to help the part that unnerved him but he avoided her anyways."

"Otou-sama, I don't think that the nii-san should blame himself for that." She professed, leaning forward slightly against Hyūga manners to express her feelings on that point. "She obviously still considered him a friend even after being missing a whole ten years."

"She had, and he decided that if at all possible he would not do something like that again." Hiashi agreed lightly. "Now daughter, tell me. What was the point of this story?"

Hinata blinked at him, considering the story as a whole and not as possibly something true that she might figure out eventually. "Not to judge others, Otou-sama?"

"Not quite, little hime. The point is not to judge others for things beyond their control. That ancient warrior woman could not help the events that made her live through her first death, but the nii-san held that against her anyways. Had she not decided to forgive him for it, his first child might have been stolen from him."

"She sounds nice though, Otou-sama. She did forgive him for it."

"Ah, but he might have lost the chance to both thank her and make amends for his avoidance had that demon monster proven to be too much for her to fight." Claimed the head of the Hyūga clan, as evenly as he could. "Learn from the mistakes of others, daughter, and realize your mistakes so they can be mended quickly. Do not leave it for later, for there was almost no later to do so in for that nii-san."

Hinata nodded once, firmly as she fixed that into her memory at her father's bidding. "I will, Otou-sama."

"To bed then, little hime. I will see you in the morning."

"Goodnight, Otou-sama." She gave him a deep bow, rising up and moving to her protective bed only slightly unstably from sitting in one position so long.

Hiashi gave his heiress a slight smile of her own as he moved to her bedroom door. "Goodnight daughter."

Hizashi was waiting for his older brother outside of his niece's room. "You do know Natsumi does not blame you for that, right?"

"It does not make me feel any better about it, or for what nearly happened if she had not proven so forgiving." He informed his younger twin, lowly because Hinata might be trying to listen in, as he moved them both farther from his daughter's bedroom. "Hisana might not have been able to use the crib's seal to protect them both from that Kumo-nin had she not, and my wife and daughter might have come to harm otherwise."

"However she had and your wife did, so she and your daughter are safe. Dwelling on past mistakes does not become you, nii-sama. It is unseemly for a Hyūga warrior to wallow in guilt." The Hyūga branch head gave his elder brother a broader smile than the clan head seemed capable of. "Besides, you tell that story one more time and little Hinata-hime might actually figure it out for herself. There are not that many 'golden hair leaders' who have women warriors to call sempai by we are friends with... and only one pair that can seal."

"I will not tell it again, I merely wished to impart the lesson on her strongly enough so if she ever learns of young Naruto-kun's burden she will not judge him for it."

"Mmm, sure nii-sama." Hizashi agreed, giving a bland smile in return for Hisahi's sharp look. "I need to go put my son to bed, if you have no more need of me?"

"Go, I will see you in the morning." The elder twin informed the younger, just as blandly. "Tell Neji-kun I will set aside an hour for his kata practice next week if he is good for you and Misaki tomorrow."

Said younger twin chuckled lightly. "That will guarantee good behavior, for sure."

"I do appreciate the offer to mind the clan while Hisana and I are gone, otouto."

"Well… it is not every day one's anniversary comes up, nii-sama. Think of it as my present for you both." Hizashi gave his older brother another smile. "Bring me back a souvenir, if you could."


	5. The Sealing of Shukaku

**Author's Note** : Wow… okay, this got kind of long…

* * *

><p><em>The Sealing of Shukaku (Komushi's New Apprentice)<em>

Komushi liked to think he had a very strong tolerance for strange or random things. He had to be, his old fūinjutsu master could do strange and random things almost without thought at the drop of a senbon. Repeated exposure to that Leaf kunoichi alone forced one to adapt quickly or get trampled, and he _had_ survived nearly two years of living under that woman's roof.

Some things, though, made him wonder if he wasn't the strange one.

Komushi looked between the Honored Siblings of Suna, the Sandaime Kazekage, and the kage's son standing with his currently pregnant wife; all of them crowded into the Kazekage's office for a late night meeting. "Uh… forgive me for saying so… but that's a _bad_ idea."

"You think so?" Chiyo-baa-sama questioned sharply, almost glaring at the darkly tanned shinobi. "And what do you base that opinion off of?"

"That I'm the only _formally trained_ fūinjutsu user in Sunagakure?" Once, long before he ever got jōnin rank, Komushi might have been unnerved to be on the opposite end of an argument from his best friend's revered grandmother, but that had been before getting taught a highly lethal skill set by a particular Nara kunoichi. He still privately thought his old shishou was a bit scarier than the old puppet mistress. "Fact of the matter is, if we wished to get a head start that way then any seal attempted for that would have to be applied when the child is still within the womb. However… trying that would just invite risks to the stability of the seal, either from applying it before the child has a stable and developed chakra network or from the difficulty in applying it in the first place. Not even taking into account any risk to the okaa-san herself during application, there would still be the risk that the bijuu utilized would either have greater access to the child or even become free due to the deterioration of the seal from the okaa-san's own chakra network interfering or attempting to dissolve the foreign chakra present within her. It wouldn't naturally be part of Karura-sama's own system or her child's, it would be mine and the bijuu's, therefore she would treat it like chakra poisoning at the very least. While sealing a baby is the preferred method, I don't think any attempts to seal an _unborn_ baby will work as well or better than the usual way."

Satoshi, hearing the risk that would put his daughter-in-law and his latest grandchild under if they wished to go through with the suggestion given to their fūinjutsu user, scowled heavily and dismissed the suggestion now that he had heard his seal user's opinion on it. "Then we will attempt another method. Komushi, develop a seal for application _after_ the birth. If we must have a jinchūriki, we will have a _stable_ one."

His son almost looked as if he wanted to protest his father's decision, as it had been his idea that was just turned down, but Karura squeezed her husband's arm and he instead remained silent.

Chiyo looked rather approving, but if that was over Komushi arguing with her or hearing the worst of the ratifications he had foreseen after only hearing the suggestion the seal user didn't know. Ebizō didn't look nearly as satisfied as his elder sister did, but the jōnin Sand-nin was going to attribute that to his supposed 'Leaf influence'.

Why it was the elder siblings were split on the opinions of the Sand-Leaf alliance, Komushi was going to attribute to their nearly legendary petty rivalry. Chiyo was for if, therefore Ebizō was against it because she was all for it.

He just wished they would get over it already.

As interesting as it was explaining a few less known things of the art of fūinjutsu to Chiyo, he would appreciate not getting suspiciously glared at by her slightly younger brother while doing so. He would also like it if he wasn't challenged to explain certain things in the middle of doing something else, or the grumbles over the character of the kunoichi who taught him.

He was fond of his fūinjutsu master, it was inevitable when the woman went out of her way to ensure he was both intact and fully instructed as best she could even when injured or under orders.

Speaking of which. "Kazekage-sama, permission to travel to Konohagakure."

Satoshi gave him a level look, as if mentally weighing the request and his reasoning for asking. "Why?"

"To get some clarification. I don't think shishou can directly help me, from how she very pointedly never told me certain things and the holes she was probably ordered to leave in my lessons I got that much, but she may have some advice I can use for creating the seal you wish to have for this." Komushi quirked a wry grin at his bemused expression. "Shishou is very much like the cats she Summons. If you order her to do something she doesn't like or doesn't agree with, she'll test it and find herself loopholes to exploit. She was ordered not to tell me certain things, so she very _pointedly_ never told me certain things in a way that I knew she couldn't tell me."

"Are you sure she will aid you?"

The jōnin gave the Honored Grandmother a lopsided grin of her own. "Shishou is fond of me. I know that, because she'll only play with those she likes. Even if she can't tell me anything directly, she will still ensure I get something out of asking."

"I have a few missives that need to be taken to Konoha." Satoshi offered after a moment of thinking about it. "You and Sasori may have some time to congratulate your old shishou over the birth of her clan's heir, which so happens to be her own son. What you do with any extra time is up to you both."

"Thank you, Kazekage-sama."

(ooo000ooo)

"I still think she's creepy."

"Given who she is molded after, I wonder what that says about you." Sasori countered evenly, putting the finishing touches on the puppet he had named Nakatomi. The kunoichi puppet had sustained some damage in the redhead's last war deployment, and now she was fixed the puppet master reaffixed the Konohagakure ANBU mask back on to her face. A cat mask with two curving black lines on each side. "I would have thought you would favor her."

Komushi pulled a face at his best friend, still warily eyeing the puppet that unnerved him.

There wasn't really a reason why the fūinjutsu user was wasting time in Sasori's puppet workshop, other than the fact Komushi liked to inspect his seal work sometimes and ensure it was still working as he wanted it to. They were the first bits of fūinjutsu he had inked in Sunagakure, and as long as they stayed working he knew he could leave the rest of it alone. Once they lost power, or didn't work exactly as they had when the ink was still fresh, he would then touch up the rest of the seals he had inked into certain parts of his village for security reasons.

Of course, that also meant he had an official reason to go bother his best friend some days. Which, while convenient, wasn't quite his problem that particular day.

It had only happened once, but he had seen his shishou in her ANBU uniform. The change had been jarring, from the jōnin kunoichi to ANBU captain. It was one thing to know a person was lethal if irritated too much, it was another to know that was also a woman that liked to watch him turn beet red or almost smack himself for missing the point of a lesson could be like that. Almost cold, calculating, and near silent instead of mischievous, playful, and patiently caring.

Nakatomi sharply reminded him of that occasion, and the odd feeling it had left him with.

Sasori was an artist, and a very good judge of physical size. All puppet masters were, because of controlling a human sized replica from however far away forced them to be or miss their targets. Nakatomi was a near perfect replica of Nara Natsumi's physical shape and size, as she was the day she offered to Sasori to teach his best friend fūinjutsu.

"Are you sure you don't mind coming with me?" Komushi asked instead of continuing that conversation, because the both of them knew it wouldn't be going anywhere new.

"You already wrote to Natsumi-dono, she will be expecting the both of us. I would like her advice for wielding a sword." Setting Nakatomi's weaponry back in place, both the poison wells in her palms and the katana she used as a weapon, Sasori resealed his puppet for easy transport. Storage seals variants were the one thing he had pestered his best friend into teaching him the moment he returned to Suna. "I am interested in meeting her son, as well. He may prove interesting given time."

"You and shishou, I swear."

"You should not complain, Komushi. You were the one to benefit from Natsumi-dono deciding I was interesting enough to want to keep an eye on."

The darkly tanned fūinjutsu user grinned sheepishly as his best friend finished tidying up his workshop tools. "True, and I am thankful she decided you were. Who knows where I would be now without that apprenticeship?"

\V/

Nara Shikamaru blinked at this new person he was being shown.

Sasori blinked back at him, waiting to see what the baby would do.

Yawning, the heir of the Nara clan decided a nap was more entertaining than continuing to stare down a Sunagakure jōnin shinobi puppet master.

Komushi snickered while Nara Natsumi rolled her eyes at her own son, then she turned to her old apprentice sitting in her home with a small smile for him. "Your letter didn't say what this trip out here was for, Komushi, but I am happy to see you have all ten fingers still."

Sunagakure's sole fūinjutsu user grinned back at her, he had missed her even if she liked to make him blush horribly sometimes. "Mostly to see your baby, shishou, but I do have a few questions."

"Hmm…" The kunoichi pursed her lips, drumming the fingers of one hand on the floorboards she was seated on as she considered that. "Are these questions about the things I pointedly never told you about?"

Komushi's grin fell and he sighed. "Yes. I know you probably can't tell me, shishou, but I would desperately like whatever help you can give me."

He knew it was a long shot, but the woman was probably the best method he had to get _anything_ out of Konohagakure's fūinjutsu masters on the topic of jinchūriki seals. If his old shishou was unable to, it wasn't likely he would get better aid anywhere else.

"I am still under orders, so I cannot directly inform you of what you wish to know."

"Directly?" Sasori repeated shrewdly, distracted from examining the baby Nara heir. "Can you indirectly aid us then, Natsumi-dono?"

"I have already. I very pointedly never told Komushi what he is now asking about, the gaps should be rather noticeable." Shrugging, the Leopard Summoner grinned a bit toothily at them both. "Additionally, my sometimes thick apprentice should wonder why I gave him _two_ gifts for his completion of his fūinjutsu apprenticeship when the tradition is _one_ useable but costly item and some supplies. If I ask, I may be denied to do even that much as this is Uzumaki territory he is asking about."

"Oh." Komushi felt like smacking himself, a feeling he distinctly recalled from his apprenticeship under this same kunoichi. That had been unusual, but he had written it off as her being herself and not something to poke at. "Well… oh."

Sasori gave his best friend an exasperated look.

"Be _sure_ of your seal work, Komushi." The Leaf kunoichi stressed, a faint line of worry creasing her brow as she sternly looked at her old apprentice. "Screwing up this is a whole lot worse than just exploding what you're working on. To test your theory, whatever it is over or about, try sealing a storage seal to yourself first."

He nodded distractedly, still wondering what she hid in his fūinjutsu apprenticeship mastery gifts. "Hai shishou. Will you still ask?"

"Yeah, and it's my otouto now so I might actually get permission to help you a little. How much would be mostly up to him, though."

"I liked Minato-san… sama." Correcting himself sheepishly, Komushi started grinning again. "He was very patient with me when I asked him questions."

"But he's now married to Uzumaki Kushina-hime." Natsumi reminded him, a touch dryly. "It might just be up to her, what I will be able to tell or show-"

Shikamaru suddenly hiccupped, startling himself out of his nap. Scrunching up his nose in dislike, the baby gripped his mother's tank top and pouted up at her.

"That's not my fault, you're the one that did it." When her son didn't seem too phased at that denial, the Nara kunoichi sighed. "Excuse me, gentlemen, I think someone may be hungry."

"Aa… should we leave?" Sasori had a good poker face, but Komushi blushed horribly at what his mind showed him.

There were some things one did not wish to know or see about their instructors. The darker of the two Suna-nin would have appreciated going his whole life without getting that image in his head.

"Naw, I'll go upstairs. You two are free to hang around if you want."

"I think we should go," Komushi insisted, warily looking around at the Nara clan head's study, "Shikaku-sama still scares me."

She blinked at him, surprised. "_Still?_"

"Naras are scary, shishou." He insisted again, getting up and helping her up because she did look a little stressed and a tiny bit tired already and it wasn't even noon yet. Komushi really did wish he had the guts to ask what was bothering her so much, even if he couldn't help her. "He showed me once, what a Nara could do with one's shadows. Then he told me one could not out run their own shadows. I don't want to see that again."

"He did, did he?" The Nara kunoichi rolled her eyes, her faintly annoyed look changing to fond exasperation when her baby snagged hold of her hair to tug on. "Well alright then, I'll see you two tomorrow?"

"Hai, shishou."

"Very well, Natsumi-dono."

Natsumi waved them out, trekking up the stairs while her old apprentice showed himself and his best friend out of the house.

Komushi led the way back to the hotel they had arranged to stay in for their visit to the Village Hidden in the Leaves, because he was that much more familiar with Konohagakure streets than his best friend. "Well… this is a bit more lucrative than I thought it would be."

"We might not have had to leave Suna had you checked that." Sasori observed dryly, interestedly watching the forest's edge the Nara clan's compound was built around. "Why did you never check that?"

"Shishou carved and built them, I thought it was just because she bought enough wood for two and not one since she made them both herself." He defended himself sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. "I wonder what she left me, though."

"You may be able to ask straight out."

"No, no I won't. Shishou will never let me live that down."

(ooo000ooo)

Nara Natsumi managed to secure the permission to fill in the holes she had left in his instruction, and set aside most of a few weeks to do that instruction.

Sasori ended up using his puppets to amuse Shikamaru with a few times, much to his bemusement.

Komushi, since his shishou did manage all that for him, outlined roughly what his Kazekage wished for. Behind her rather formidable security seals, but he did.

She was, quite frankly, horrified.

Then she snagged one of the loose rolls of paper, the one that had natural energy of the human form displayed on, and smacked him upside the head with it. "No."

"Shishou-"

She bopped his nose next, scowling. "_No_, Komushi. A chakra storage seal _is_ a derivative of the jinchūriki seals, yes. But a chakra storage seal is stripped of all the things that would allow it to safely seal a _corrosive entity of chakra that thinks for itself within a human form_. Stop taking sealing advice from Chiyo-baa-sama. She's a lovely old woman, sure, but _not_ a fūinjutsu master."

Now that had been pointed out for him, Komushi blinked at the Leaf kunoichi while clutching his abused nose. "Oh… oh right. No, that would have been bad."

Natsumi looked slightly pained at that admittance. "Yes, _bad_. So, I'm not sure if Suna has a standard seal pattern for this. Quite honestly, I don't care either. Your village's past jinchūriki aren't exactly the best of the lot so in the interest of inter-village cooperation, and because having a jinchūriki of our best ally be as crazy as a squirrel that ate fermented fruits is a bad thing all around, I got permission for you to have a copy of the Uzumaki made seal for your own use."

Both Sand ninja stared at her, she cocked an eyebrow back.

"What?"

"The seal, shishou?"

"Did you _never_ wonder why I gave you two fūinjutsu apprentice mastery gifts?" She asked archly instead of producing the seal, sighing at his rather violent blush. "I needed more space, for your information."

Komushi's jaw dropped, and he stared at her.

When it looked like she was seriously considering hitting him with her rolled up piece of paper again, the darkly tanned Sunagakure shinobi hastily recollected his scattered wits.

"So then… I already have a seal for this?"

He got hit again anyways, and she dropped the abused paper while eyeing him sternly again with her mismatched eyes. "_No_, for… just no. You have a _template_, Komushi. If you do not understand what you're doing, the seal will not be as secure as your fellow shinobi would wish. You have a _template_ to dissect and learn from, but that is not finished nor completely ready for use."

"Aa… someone is awake." Sasori interrupted them, nodding to the baby heir of the Nara clan.

Natsumi and Komushi both turned to the couch, where the baby had been situated for his nap. Shikamaru blinked back at them, seeming amused at the abuse his mother had heaped on her old student. The kunoichi narrowed her eyes at her son, who blinked at her again with big eyes and tried to wave a hand. Relocating her son prevented any crying, and the baby seemed perfectly content to just be held instead of be fussed over. She rolled her eyes at him and turned back to her old apprentice.

"Shishou? Why can you tell me this now and not back when I was still learning?"

"That's a bit of an involved story." She claimed, grabbing something soft and fuzzy for her baby to practice his grip on. "You did hear how we lost two Village Elders, yes? One of the two was the reason I wasn't allowed to, and now that they're gone and Minato's going to be our next Hokage I have a bit more leeway now rather than then."

Komushi nodded thoughtfully, wondering which two it had been and if he could figure out if either of them died of less than natural causes. "Thanks, shishou."

"Write me a letter afterwards, just so I know you're still alive." Natsumi instructed dryly with a small smile. "You don't have to tell me anything about it, I just would like to know you have all ten fingers after attempting this."

(ooo000ooo)

Komushi lasted until his very last night they were allowed to spend in Konohagakure no Sato, then both what he had been ordered to do and what he was planning on crashed down on him.

Admittedly he had known _what_ he was doing, but the logistical problems of _how_ had been enough of a distraction to keep his mind off it.

Thankfully, his fūinjutsu master had a two-month-old baby. That pretty much guaranteed she would still be up even in the middle of the night, or at least sleeping lightly enough to both wake up and hear his concerns.

It wasn't until the very bleary eyed kunoichi sat him in her kitchen and made them both tea did Komushi have another crisis of his conscience, given she was a Leaf ninja and he a Sand shinobi.

Nara Natsumi merely blinked at him sleepily while he internally panicked over his choice of subject to worry about. "Fuck's sake, Komushi, spit it out."

"I've-"

It was as far as he got, still wondering how to inform her of his current concerns and not give away his village's secrets at the same time.

Another reason inter-village apprenticeships probably didn't happen very often, but not much help to him at that moment.

"Sunagakure no Sato wishes for a jinchūriki, they asked you to do said sealing." She started for him blandly, her left arm supporting her head off the table between them while she kept an ear out for her son. "You had questions to that effect, so you came here to ask me the technical details. Obviously, both your and my own village leaders know and support said sharing of information. Deep breath, start from the beginning."

He blinked at her a few times, inwardly thankful his shishou hadn't lost the ability to almost pluck his worries from his head. "A _baby_, shishou."

"Yes, that's typically how this crap goes."

"But it's a _baby!_ I'm going to seal a-a _bijuu_ into… _someone's_ baby!" The Suna-nin gripped his own hair, keeping his voice low because he wouldn't put it past Natsumi to hit him with her teapot if he woke her own baby. "Why?"

"Because it's _safer_ that way, both for us and the baby in question." She spoke bitterly, her mismatched eyes on the teacup in her right hand instead on him. "What you need to keep in mind is that he or she _is_ someone's baby, and ensure whatever seal you end up using is the best thing you can script for it. Even afterwards, no matter what happens, keep in contact and frequently remind others that whoever ends up the jinchūriki _is_ human no matter the unwilling boarder in their guts."

"But-"

"Komushi, if you're going to do this shit do it right." Natsumi finally looked up at him, glaring to ensure her point was made. "I've met a few jinchūriki, you know. I've also kept an ear out for the others. There are many ways they are treated, but mostly they're either exploited or scorned to the point I seriously wonder why they haven't slaughtered their villages yet. Han of the five-tails? If I didn't know better I'd say he _hated_ his fellow Iwa-nin."

"Know better?"

"Rōshi of four." She clarified, not sounding at all pleased with the conversation topic. "But from what I've seen, they pretty much stick together if they can. Iwagakure no Sato's jinchūriki aren't very well treated, but they're both stubborn and hard headed so that will probably never change unless someone gets in a lucky hit. There's that jinchūriki in Taki, _they flat out avoid him._ If he died on mission I wouldn't be surprised if they threw a party out there. B and Yugito out of Kumo seem to have the best option of very bad ones, I'd say even better than here honestly. At least they have some freedom and probably more respect than even here if ours was ever widely known."

He sighed heavily, cradling his still steaming tea between lightly scarred hands. "I don't want to do that to someone, shishou."

"That makes you a better person than half the population of the Hidden Countries." Natsumi informed him dryly. "However, we're ninja and wants normally don't play into our orders. If someone has to, then it should be the best fūinjutsu user Suna has for it."

"The _only_ fūinjutsu user we have." Komushi corrected her, just as dry as her tone of voice.

"I don't know… from the way your Chiyo-baa-sama keeps _suggesting_ things that are, quite frankly, ridiculous, she might fancy herself one of us."

"I've seen her meager store of seals, shishou."

"And?"

"Oh _kami_ no. I'm surprised half of them actually work."

Natsumi cracked a small smile for him. "If you didn't know the oh so _scary_ art of the ninja wielded brush, it would probably be her attempting the sealing."

Komushi pulled a face at her suggestion. "I highly doubt it, shishou. Chiyo-baa-sama frequently reminds everyone that she doesn't like fūinjutsu."

"And yet?"

He sighed at her.

Her smile turned into a slight smirk. "I know you probably want to talk to me about the moralities of actually _sealing_ a bijuu into someone's baby, Komushi, but I've pretty much violated almost all of mine over the course of my kunoichi career. I've never cheated on Shika and I've not been the cause of death of anyone under the age of ten, which is the last of them I've held to. So I'm probably not the best one to talk to about this level of crap you're struggling with. Kami _knows_ I've still got a few issues I'm trying to come to terms with."

Frowning, Komushi belatedly recalled what else Nara Natsumi did before having a baby heir for her clan. "Oh."

"And I'm pretty sure Sasori might be a better person to talk to, given that he's from your village and not me."

He blinked at her, and she pointed to the back door.

"He's on the porch. Be a dear and take him a clean teacup while you two drink the rest of the pot." Natsumi cocked her head, looking over to the entranceway that lead farther into the house. "Hubby mine, you had best be here to fetch a bottle and not to raid the preserves again."

"Who said I couldn't do both?" Shikaku asked lightly as he wandered into the kitchen, nodding at his wife's old apprentice. "Komushi. Is there a reason why Sasori-san is standing on the back porch?"

The noise of baby fussing reached them the same time the Nara clan head reached the fridge, reminding the Sand-nin of the beginning of his apprenticeship when he used to live with them. It was probably a good thing he finished his lessons before they had to try raising a baby as well. Kami only knew how irritable they both had to have been when adjusting to their son's needs. "Oh, I've apparently got to talk to him but shishou…"

"I made them tea, Shika. I'm going back to bed if you got Maru-chan." The kunoichi finished for him, hiding a yawn behind a clawed hand. "Remember the porch isn't sealed for privacy, Komushi… and just leave the pot and cups on the table when you two are done."

\V/

The first thing Komushi did, once home in Suna's desert village instead of Konoha's forested one, was head home and pull everything off his scroll case and writing table.

Curiosity didn't just kill the cat, it tended to end a few shinobi as well.

Sasori followed him and pitched in, mostly just to see what seal his fūinjutsu master had snuck him long before it became something he had to ask for.

Natsumi had, thankfully, built both pieces of furniture with the intent to be pulled apart later, and even a few years of use hadn't diminished the dark stain she had used to mock out a Four Symbols Seal copy for him. The stain had been applied to the underside of the cedar wood, broken apart where the edges of the wood slats ended but still recognizable as an Uzumaki seal.

Mostly due to the large swirl in the middle that tended to end up the focus of any seals that clan had created.

"I had wondered why she used that style of jointing and not glue." Sasori informed his best friend, pausing in his work to inspect the seal template. "Normally furniture that supports weight is glued together."

"I did say shishou was fond of me." Komushi claimed as he dug out a fresh sheet of paper. He'd copy it for later study, and so he could put his writing table back together for use. "I'm not really surprised she managed something like this even back when she wasn't supposed to be doing things like this."

The puppet master finished unscrewing some of the hardware that allowed the writing desk's drawer to pull out, exposing the last of the seal for copying, before getting up and tucking his tools away. "How long do you think this will take you?"

"A few months, at the very least. I know how to take this apart and rescript it for myself, it's just getting the time to work on it that will be somewhat difficult."

Sasori blinked at him, then at the wood laid out on the fūinjutsu user's study floor, and then back to him. "Maybe you should finally accept an apprentice?"

Pausing, Komushi frowned back over his shoulder at his best friend. "Do I have to?"

"Well… from what baa-sama has said they are rather keen on you passing on what you learned to someone else." He informed him calmly, then gestured to the seal mockup on his apartment floor. "And taking an apprentice would allow you more time to yourself while you ground them in the basics. Satoshi-sama will probably relieve you of some of your duties while you teach, and then you can task your student with some of them instead of handling everything yourself."

"Hmmm…"

"Additionally, I am to ask what you would like in a student." Sasori continued when it seemed as if his best friend was actually considering it. "So we may start looking."

"Shishou said to start with someone not of my chakra nature, or I'll be tempted to lead them through by the nose. Like, years ago." Komushi thought aloud. "Handwriting isn't as urgent, because that would require additional refinement anyways. So someone that wishes to learn, and probably fūton natured. We could develop standard seal patterns like that, seals everyone may use and not something I have to ink."

"I will let the Kazekage know."

Startled, the darker skinned jōnin stared at his pale fellow.

Sasori smirked as he slowly edged to the doorway. "I think Satoshi-sama wished you to teach one of his grandchildren, actually. Temari-chan. So your requirements are perfect."

"Sasori! Don't-"

"Kaa-san would like you to come over for dinner sometime soon, I will see you later Komushi." The puppet master spoke over him, rather quickly making his way out of the fūinjutsu user's apartment.

Komushi gaped after him, then huffed as he turned back to the seal copy.

He had the sinking feeling he may be getting in over his head, however Sasori was correct in that an apprentice would help out a little. He really should have taken one years ago, but given how long his own shishou had taken to teach him the basics he had kept putting it off.

Although… teaching the four-year-old granddaughter of the Kazekage a highly destructive, possibly lethal shinobi art?

Maybe he should start with a year or two of calligraphy practice first.

(ooo000ooo)

Young Temari was not amused. "Why do I have to learn?"

Because Komushi would be sealing a bloodthirsty beast made up solely out of chakra into her youngest sibling, and this way she would be perfectly placed to help him keep an eye on that seal as the years stretched on. The jōnin fūinjutsu user was pretty sure she wouldn't like that explanation, so instead he dug around in his small stash of sealing supplies.

What did young children like at her age?

"Mari-chan, please just give it a try." Karura frowned slightly at her willful eldest child, getting the tiny blond to sulk. "It is a highly respectable skill, dear."

Komushi pulled the seal he had been looking for out of his stash of premade ones, wrapping it around the hilt of a kunai.

Temari, still scowling, warily eyed the paper. "What does that do?"

She didn't sound all that pleased, but at least reluctantly accepting that she wasn't going to be given a choice in this.

Sunagakure no Sato's soon to be fūinjutsu master grinned lightly at his soon to be apprentice. "This? This is a seal my shishou is known for. She specialized in explosives, you know."

Temari blinked at him as he flicked the kunai to the far end of the home of the Kazekage's training grounds, then gaped at the explosive that went off at a mere flick of Komushi's chakra.

Thankfully he did have somewhat of a reputation for testing seals wherever he might be, so the guards on the currently pregnant daughter-in-law of the Kazekage and her firstborn daughter didn't attempt to make him a head shorter for using explosives near them both. Given that all that was left of his sealing master's seal was a crater and probably melted shards of metal from the kunai, he ignored that and them when they peered over to see what the hell he was doing.

"Just so you know, fūinjutsu users start learning to seal on explosive seals." Komushi tempted her with a slight grin. "That's how my shishou learned to do this, it's how I learned to do that, and it's how I'll be teaching you to do it."

The tiny girl, just out of toddlerhood, blinked blankly at the hole in her family's yard then at the young jōnin that caused it with a slip of _paper_. "Okay… teach me."

"Yes, well… first we have a slight issue. I'm afraid it's fraught with peril and possibly the one point that makes or breaks a fūinjutsu user."

"I can do it. I'm the Kazekage-jii-sama's granddaughter." Temari claimed stubbornly, getting more attached to the idea of learning to seal if it was so difficult.

Komushi tried not to smirk at her. "Are you sure? It is almost horrifying, what we need to do."

"Try me."

Karura frowned slightly at them both, confused. She hadn't heard of this, and wondered if she should have been less enthusiastic to have her daughter become the second fūinjutsu user of Suna.

"How's your calligraphy?"

Temari blinked at him again, this time in a horrified fashion. Her mother tried to hide her snicker.

The jōnin nodded, almost faux sadly. "I know, terrible right?"

"You suck."

"Temari-chan!"

"I got bored with calligraphy practice two minutes into my own apprenticeship." Komushi informed the little girl, only slightly mournfully. "Unfortunately, it _is_ a specialization we all require to at least attempt mastering in order to be good fūinjutsu users. My shishou made me practice almost two years before letting me start on the better parts of my lessons, the one where I blew up ink jars for practice. Do you think you can do better, Temari-chan?"

She considered him, while sneaking glances to the hole in her family's training yard. "I bet I can do it in a _year_."

"I will hold you to that, then." The jōnin claimed lightly. "Best part of it is that learning to read fūinjutsu designs is started at the very beginning, so you'll at least be able to break up the boring bits with that."

Temari nodded sharply at him, then with almost a doomed expression retreated inside to locate where her calligraphy supplies were. Karura sighed at her daughter's lack of manners, giving the shinobi who would be teaching her daughter his ninja art a small smile. "I'm sorry about that, Komushi-kun."

"Oh you'll probably hear bad things about the methods I'll use to teach her, don't worry. But since I was taught in a very… interesting manner, it's how I'll have to teach her… at least at first." The jōnin reassured her easily as he got up, snagging his supplies on the way. "It will be a learning opportunity for us both. And, once I have her trained up to start exploring how her own scripting methods differ from my own, she'll be the one teaching my next apprentice the beginning bits. Two or three years from now, probably."

"Then you're sure she can do what took you two years to master in one?"

He nodded a few times. "Easily. She won't have her lessons spaced between both her shishou's mission work for another village and suiton jutsu lessons. My apprenticeship was for both fūinjutsu and water natured chakra use, Karura-sama. She'll probably get to inks by her next birthday, and maybe actually inking her own seals just before starting her formal shinobi training."

She accepted that easily enough, hesitating before following her daughter's path back into her home. "Komushi-kun, are you sure you can do… that?"

"Shishou managed to give me both an example of the best seal used for that, and corrected a few misconceptions for me." Komushi reassured the kunoichi, suppressing his desire to cringe at the request for information. No matter what, this would be the mother of their jinchūriki he would be sealing. How he felt about his orders to do this was still somewhat murky for the Suna-nin. "A few months of dedicated work on it, and I'll have both a working seal and some things to test on myself before I'll get anywhere near your baby with a bloody ink brush."

Karura blinked at him. "You will be testing on _yourself?_"

"Well… yes. Natsumi-shishou gave me a few exercises to test my hypothesis so you and your baby will not need to risk an unstable seal." Komushi clarified thoughtfully. "She has a child of her own, Karura-sama. Shishou wasn't exactly surprised to hear what I had gone out to see her for, but she did tell me that if I was to be the one to do this I should do it right. She also informed me of the more visible jinchūriki and how they are treated, and that keeping contact and reminding everyone that said jinchūriki is still human was something I should do."

The kunoichi was silent as she processed that, frowning slightly at her home. "Thank you, then. Inform your shishou of my thanks as well, the next time you write her."

He nodded once, still feeling incredibly guilty over the whole issue.

Komushi's talk with Sasori on the Nara clan head's home's back porch, sealed for privacy as his old fūinjutsu master warned him to do, had helped somewhat. Not a whole lot, because some of it was more than just confusion over the orders he had received, but it _had_ helped. Personal feelings over his orders were more of his own problem, something his best friend couldn't assist much with other than lending him an ear sometimes.

Hopefully, before he actually had to seal the woman's newborn child, he could at least stop the automatic flinch that he wanted to do whenever the subject came up.

\V/

Komushi spent the next three months working on the seal he had been given, deconstructing it and then piecing it back together.

Temari, though having been bored of her own calligraphy practice nearly as quickly as her new shishou had been when he was an apprentice, was keen on her actual fūinjutsu lessons on reading seals whenever he could give them. The distraction, while a daily occurrence, didn't last nearly long enough for Komushi's peace of mind.

The other distractions weren't nearly as welcome, though.

The sole fūinjutsu user, still, of Sunagakure blinked at Sasori's grandmother and Satoshi's son. Then wondered if he could give himself a concussion hard enough to forget the last three minutes. "No."

Chiyo frowned at him. "What do you mean 'no'?"

"No. There's a reason why I use _my own blood_ in my fūinjutsu ink, baa-sama, and it's not because of any security reasons. The blood contains a slight amount of chakra, and if we use Karura-sama's blood it will not aid me in inking this seal but fight me because Karura-sama and I do not share chakra natures, much less have comparable signatures." Komushi clarified for them both, rubbing a hand across his face in exasperation. "It might even draw her chakra into the process, which will do her no favors after giving birth. Especially if you wish me to do it the very moment little Gaara-chan is born, as that might just kill her if she's pulled in."

"My husband needs to recall that he is _not_ a fūinjutsu user, Komushi-kun." The kunoichi currently being talked about loudly announced as she carefully made her way into the room the two had cornered the jōnin in, frowning at the reasons for the delay in Temari's lesson for the day. "He should really leave the sealing details to you and not badger you with trying to handle more on top of what you're already trying to do."

"Wife-"

"_No_, husband. Komushi-kun knows what he is doing, far better than anyone else in this room would. Stop bothering him." Karura rather pointedly informed both her husband and the Honored Grandmother. "He even went and checked with his own shishou to ensure he knew what he was doing. Neither of you would allow someone else to instruct you how to do your own jobs, why try it with our only fūinjutsu user? Komushi-kun, Temari-chan is waiting for you."

The two kunoichi actually _glared_ at each other, enabling the named jōnin to sneak around and escape the conversation.

Yashamaru, Karura's younger brother, cheerfully waved at his fellow jōnin as he shamelessly eavesdropped on the ensuring argument his pregnant sister started with the Honored Grandmother. Komushi merely continued to where his young apprentice was probably impatiently waiting on him.

Perhaps Karura wouldn't mind switching locations for Temari's lessons to Komushi's own apartment?

\V/

"Are you ready?"

"Ha… no. Not even a little." Komushi informed his best friend, cringing slightly at the sounds of a kunoichi in labor.

Sasori blinked at him, slightly surprised. "I thought you claimed your seal was ready?"

"It is, just… we will not know if it will work unless we test it… and there is only one bijuu and one baby to become the jinchūriki." The darkly tanned shinobi could only shrug at his fellow, firmly keeping his eyes on his own fūinjutsu supplies and not on their Kazekage or the Honored Siblings standing on the other side of the hospital hallway. "So this will be both a test and actual sealing, because there was no way to accurately test it beforehand."

"You did Natsumi-dono's suggestions, yes?"

"I have three storage seals attached to my own chakra network, if that is what you're asking." Komushi shrugged again, wincing at a particularly loud shriek of pain reached the waiting men and one woman. "So I know how, and I have both a very good example of what and developed my own, but again…"

"So it will work." Sasori informed him with all seriousness. "Belief is important, Komushi."

"So is my mental health, and kami knows that's not helped much."

"Then you shouldn't have become shinobi."

Komushi gave his best friend a flat look for that unhelpful comment, Sasori merely gave him a creepily serene smile.

"Komushi-san? They're ready for you." Yashamaru informed the room at large, looking slightly worried even if he tried to hide it from them all.

The jōnin sighed, and picked his supplies up. "I will need a steady set of hands, Yashamaru-san. Can you assist?"

(ooo000ooo)

"So far, it seems to have worked. We will not know for sure until little Gaara-chan can actually somewhat control himself and we can measure any variation between him and his siblings, Kazekage-sama, but that will probably be a few years yet."

Satoshi nodded slightly, looking over the reports of both his daughter-in-law's recovery and his latest grandson's health. "What of the dark rings around his eyes?"

"All jinchūriki have physical signs of their… situation." Komushi informed him, thinking back to the warning his shishou gave him about such things. "Some are obvious and some are not, and given Yashamaru-san's lack of findings for a physical reason it may just be because he's now a jinchūriki and not any other reason."

"You still intend to inspect the seal periodically?"

"Yes, though Gaara-chan's own chakra should stabilize the seal I would prefer checks to ensure no deviations occurs while he grows."

The Kazekage pinned his only fūinjutsu using jōnin with an inquiring look. "Have you heard my son's proposal to train him?"

"Well… yes." Komushi confirmed slowly.

"What do you think?"

"That I'm glad Karura-sama will probably smack him upside the head once she is released from the hospital and keep him from doing that."

Satoshi blinked at his shinobi, keeping his expression blank. "Explain."

"Gaara-chan is still a baby, Kazekage-sama. I would probably murder anyone that asked to treat my own child that way. Unless he becomes dangerous to himself or others, there isn't a real reason to treat him differently than his siblings. Isolation from his family and any potential friends will do his loyalty to the village no good, and will probably cause the worst of the behavioral problems in other Hidden Villages' jinchūriki to show in him. Kumogakure no Sato seems to have the best set of them, and those two are treated better than any other country treats their own. If we want Gaara-chan to be stable, treating him like a pariah will not help us."

The Third Wind Shadow blinked again, inclining his head to acknowledge the point. "I see."

When a long moment passed without Komushi getting dismissed, the jōnin prompted the kage. "Satoshi-sama?"

"Would you follow my son if I named him the Yondaime Kazekage, Komushi?"

"Yes."

"Would you respect him?"

"Err…"

The older shinobi smirked slightly, and to his surprise Komushi didn't see any bitterness to the old man. "Who would you respect then?"

"Sasori?" The jōnin tried uncertainly, wondering if he was going to get in trouble for this.

"I see. Dismissed, Komushi. Inform me if anything changes in my grandson."

"Hai, Kazekage-sama."


	6. Drabble in Three Parts

**Author's Note** : Because for whatever reason Shikaina's Birth refuses to work itself out, and I need to get out of that writer's block, we have something a slight bit different. The new story cover is courtesy of _manillalalu_, thank you for the permission to use it.

* * *

><p><em>Drabble in Three Parts<em>

* * *

><p><strong>The Beginning<strong>

The first crack happened because of her hands.

The hands were something one couldn't _not_ see, they manipulated the world around oneself therefore you could not be anything but familiar with your own hands.

Fiona and Natsumi did not have similar hands.

Why it was that day she realized it was a little beyond her even long after said day. It could have been because that was when her spirit finally 'woke up and smelled the coffee', or possibly the first time her tiny toddler brain had the connections to actually use the information she could've possibly been born with.

Either way it had happened, it was the first time the connection finally happened and what was left of Fiona started cracking.

Well before she learned to hate mirrors, the part that survived of Fiona and what would later become Natsumi feared seeing her hands.

There was a reason they were so scarred up now, in a world of chakra using healers that could and would ensure one didn't have scars from any misadventure as long as you got to them in time.

Fiona had inherited her father's hands. Broad craftsman's hands, with blunt tips and strong palms. Good for applying force to her woodworking tools and strong enough to keep up with her life as a US Army soldier. If Fiona had ever been questioned on it, she would say she liked her hands.

Natsumi had delicately slim ones, with elegant fingers that later became tipped with sharp, cruel claws from her Summoning Contract. Oddly, the deceptively delicate hands were hated by their own owner. Not merely because it meant she no longer had Fiona's, but because they were more like what a kunoichi's and assassin's hands should look like.

Staring at your own baby pudgy hands and realizing that they were _not your hands_… well, that had been a day that would take years to dull the sickening horror of. She still had nightmares decades later.

What she had been doing and why she had been there were details Natsumi had long since lost, but she will probably always recall the horrified and numb attempt to prove that those were _not_ her hands. Gripping a wooden block with her left hand and smashing the pointer finger of her right proved only that those _were_ her hands… because that had hurt.

What Mana had thought of her daughter's strange behavior that day would forever be an idle wonder, because after helping Natsumi wrap up her tiny, bleeding digit the elder kunoichi left her wherever she had been so Mana could go run her mission.

Not too long after that day, Natsumi moved to the orphanage for the rest of her so called childhood.

She would like to claim that she would have told the elder kunoichi what that had been about if she had ever returned… but that was only with the knowledge of hindsight twenty years later that Natsumi could make that claim.

Mana had tried everything available to her to safeguard her daughter and her future, what she would have done had she learned her daughter wasn't really an innocent child was something else that gave Natsumi nightmares.

* * *

><p><strong>The Middle<strong>

Minato saved more than just Natsumi's sanity.

Because no matter how much he had grown up, no matter how much stronger or smarter he was than her now twenty years later, there was still a small part of him that was still that nine-year-old who looked up to her as his sempai.

That had made Natsumi grit her teeth and tackle her problems as best as she could, just so she didn't shatter that part of him. It had been the driving force behind her tolerance for Inoichi's meddling, for putting up with the academy during the boring parts, and for her sticking with assassin long after she could switch her classification for something else.

Then he became her reason for continuing on after reaching a shaky but stable mental footing, because Minato didn't know what she supposedly did. He didn't know the ancient Uchiha founder that survived long after being tuffed out on his ass, or that said Uchiha would try to strike at him and his wife when she would be in the middle of birthing their firstborn.

The point of which Natsumi could look around and not suddenly recall a piece of a half forgotten story from another life that would try to destroy the village they both loved so had been surreal.

It had been a driving force behind her for so long, suddenly not having anything to plan for or try to work something around had been jarring.

At a lost for what to do, because she was alive after all was said and done and she hadn't expected that, Minato's expectations for her to handle ANBU for him helped her out long enough to find a new cause to live for.

Shikaku and Shikamaru helped her immensely as well.

She was pretty sure her husband suspected there was something more than just a near-death experience that tripped her up those few weeks after being released from the hospital, but he didn't seem too interested as long as she did recover and then regain her footing.

He knew that if she had more trouble than she could deal with she would go to him or Minato or Inoichi for help, and was content to leave that up to her if she wanted help. Part of the reason why Natsumi loved Shikaku so, he wouldn't pry unless she was doing herself damage keeping it to herself.

Now instead of living just so Minato might have an edge when he sorely needed one, Natsumi lived to see her baby boy become a jōnin and take over for Shikaku as clan head.

…and to spoil a young Namikaze Naruto then send him home for Minato to deal with, just because she could.

Possibly to have her other wished for children as well.

Shikamaru needed a sibling, and she was still alive.

* * *

><p><strong>The End<strong>

Natsumi dreads it, to the point she selfishly wants to die first.

She doesn't want Shikamaru to have to try putting his broken mother back together if anything happens to Shikaku or Minato. Or for Kakashi to have to tread carefully around her like he did to Eri after Sakumo's death when all he really wanted was to hug his mother.

For all of Inoichi's work, Shikaku's help, and Minato's reinforcement; Natsumi knows perfectly well most of her is merely gossamer thin veneer. Certain reactions and behaviors she has are only there so a group of nine and ten-year-old kids wouldn't realize how badly off she had been before they decided to help her.

She already had one foray into insanity already, Natsumi wasn't sure if anyone else had caught that. Sakumo's death had caused her to become more than a little unhinged, and Danzo had been the only witness to exactly how cracked that thin coat of pleasant if crazy kunoichi had become.

Inoichi didn't randomly wander into that ever so _detailed_ memory of Fiona's death… Natsumi pushed it on him in full when he tugged it because he brushed up against a lot of sore spots in his lone foray into her head.

That had been the birth of her vicious streak, which didn't get any more manageable as the years went on.

For what if cost and gave her, Natsumi curiously doesn't regret it. She has repeated nightmares of it no matter how long it had been, and her exemption from a Yamanaka mind walk was worth it's weight in gold.

It was only because of them that Natsumi bothered to start caulking over her sharp edges so they wouldn't get hurt again, and without them she wouldn't have a reason to keep it up.

She knows the end will be a messy, broken affair. There really isn't another way for it to work, because she wasn't the kind of woman that would accept illusion or falsehoods for long.

It makes her a little wistful, over the fact she didn't die when she passed out the night of Naruto's birth.

Fiona had been just as cruelly vicious… she insured Natsumi would live after all.


	7. Shikaina's Birth

**Author's Note** : Freaking finally. Not too sure if the drabble did help or what, but yay Nara family cheesiness?

* * *

><p><em>Shikaina's Birth ... or Why Naras Are So Lazy ... or A mini-Shika Adventure ...<em>

Shikamaru's favorite part of the day was the mornings and evenings.

Not the parts everyone else though of when asked of the morning and evening, but the parts the Nara clan held sacred.

Two hours before dawn and the two hours after dusk, the time the Nara clan trained in, were the parts of the day the Nara heir liked best.

As a shinobi clan of shadow wielders, they were more powerful in the dark. When the shadows stretched everywhere and a Nara was only limited by themselves rather than what amount of shade they had at hand. That didn't mean they didn't train in the sunlit hours, but it was just easier on them to warm up or work on something in the dark.

Besides, daytime training was reserved for their teams and non-clan friends.

Every morning, in the dark hours before the sun rose, his mom would silently stalk into his bedroom and wake him up by tickling his ears with her cool fingers. Once he was awake, showered, and dressed; she would lead him outside so they could observe the traditional training hours.

At first, he had only watched his parents condition themselves as he struggled to stay awake for it. His mom with her katana and occasionally a Leopard or two and his dad with his own kagemane no jutsu and taijutsu.

They had only recently started teaching him the Nara clan's katas and he now joined them in limbering up in the mornings or practicing in the evenings.

After the morning practice, once they watched the sun rise together as it burned away the Nara clan's preferred training conditions and after they ate breakfast, they would normally pile into his parent's bed or the study's couch to nap or laze the time away until one or all of them actually had to leave the house.

Once night fell and they finished with the evening training hours, they would spend a quiet hour or so on the back porch merely watching the stars together before heading to bed.

However, his mom didn't join him and dad that morning. She hadn't for the last _two weeks_, instead she collected Akira-chan and carefully strolled off with one hand pressed to her very big belly as she wandered away.

The four-year-old Shikamaru knew what pregnant meant, and that it wasn't a permanent condition. He knew full well that was how he came to be, because his mother was his mom, and he was rather interested in actually having a sibling.

Anything that could prevent a ninja from training had to be serious, though. Even the rare times his mom had been sick didn't stop her from observing the traditional training hours, she just grumbled a bit then.

It made him wonder if he hadn't been a little hasty in reassuring his parents that he wouldn't mind being a big brother at all. This seemed to be a fair bit more serious than he had thought at the time.

(ooo000ooo)

Shikamaru gave his best impression of his mother's 'not impressed' stare so his current playmate would understand he wasn't on board with that suggestion.

Namikaze Naruto merely stuck his tongue out at him in response. He supposed his god-brother had gained some immunity to mom's less than amused looks for whatever mischief he got up to under her watch. He got exposed to it more than Shikamaru did himself, which also probably meant he also needed more practice at it in order to make the blond ever rethink his proposed course of action.

"Come on, Shika-kun! It's the _Chūnin Exams_. We won't host another until after we leave the academy." Enthused the son of the Yondaime, ignoring the little Nara's lack of excitement for the whole situation in general. "When else are we ever goin' ta get as good of a view of it?"

"When we go do it ourselves?" Shikamaru ignored the pout, Naruto was surprisingly good with suckering others into doing what he wanted with that expression. "Look, Naru-kun, kaa-chan's stressed enough as it is. I'm _not_ doing anything to add to that."

Naruto scratched at a whiskered cheek as he thought that over. "You're-err… right. 'Suppose not, then. Aww… I wanted to see it."

"Why not ask? The Hokage's supposed to be there, he might take you along with him."

He blinked big blue eyes at him, surprised and bewildered as if the thought had never occurred to him. Shikamaru heaved a sigh when Naruto scrambled upright and then inside his home to ask his mother if he could.

Some days, he wondered why he hung out with the hyper blond. Then he remembered he got exiled to Minato's and Kushina's home when his parents both had other things to do. That didn't include the days both he and Naruto got sent to a different home, or when some of his parents' friends needed their kids watched for a few hours.

"Aww dang. That would've been fun." Yamanaka Ino merely grinned brightly when the Nara heir turned the same look the other blond had been given. "Come on, Shika-kun, you know it would have been interesting to go take a look."

"Sure, until someone noted one or few of us were missing from where we're supposed to be. Then we would have been in more trouble than I want to deal with."

"True. We probably would've been grounded until we _started_ the academy." Her grin turned into a smirk, and she tapped a pink painted fingertip against her lip. "Unless, of course, someone could manage to talk one of our parents into taking us along. Real smooth, Nara."

"Naru-kun's just like that. Whatever happens from his attempt to talk to Mina-ji is all on him." Shikamaru countered lazily, going back to the book he had borrowed from hime-ba-sama earlier.

It was that or nap, and the little Nara heir was already recovered from that morning's practice session. He wasn't tired enough to go back to napping just yet.

Ino, sensing the only available child in the Yondaime's backyard was getting distracted, pouted. "Oh come on, I'm bored."

"Not my problem."

"There's nothing to do!"

"Practice your calligraphy."

"That's not even funny. Seal users are way too picky about that." Scoffing, the daughter of Konohagakure's Head of Interrogation crossed her thin arms over her chest and pouted as hard as she could.

Shikamaru wasn't impressed with her argument either. For one, he was toying with the idea of asking his mother to teach him some fūinjutsu himself, and he knew already that the art needed a lot of refinement if he really did get around to asking. Additionally, he had seen her father fold under that look regularly and one rare time when his own had done the same. He, however, was immune from growing up with her. "Read a book."

"I've already read all of Naru-kun's books," Ino protested, giving the one he held a second glance, "and Mina-ji's are all too hard."

Given that the book was one of their Yondaime's and Shikamaru was already tripping over a few unfamiliar kanji a few pages in, it probably was a little farther out of her range than she was comfortable with. "Then wait for Naru-kun to come back."

"He'll run me into the ground."

"But you won't be bored anymore."

She scowled at him. "You just don't want to move, do you?"

"Not really."

Ino flounced off with a huff, muttering things under her breath that he was mostly sure she learned from her father when he hadn't been paying attention to how close his daughter was. Shikamaru waited until she stopped near the flower patch in the far corner, because for some reason he was always asked where Ino got to as if he was her keeper, before going back to trying to figure out the book he borrowed.

(ooo000ooo)

"You got him to _read_ this?"

"Some of it, I'm pretty sure he couldn't understand a few things but it did distract him for a few hours." Kushina shrugged that aside, carefully keeping the smirk off her face because their kids could come down the stairs at any moment. "But you wanted to know if he was learning anything when he pretend naps through the few lessons we've all been giving them, and that's a good measure for how well he can read right now. He didn't ask any questions of me, so I'm assuming he understood enough to understand most of the topic."

"_A Guide to the Land of Hot Water_." Natsumi read the title stamped on the spine aloud, dearly wishing to rub the bridge of her nose… but with her nails the way they were that wasn't a good idea. "Why does Minato even have this? It's not like Hot Water was ever a difficult country to get though. They're more hippy-ish than _we_ are assumed to be."

"I actually have no idea." The redhead informed her with a slight tint of surprise to her voice and an easy shrug. "Something I'm mean to ask him as soon as he gets home. But it was the least interesting thing we've got, and I figured something dry and technical would get Shika-kun to ask for something else if it gave him some trouble."

"It'll be a few more hours, Minato's currently with my hubby trying to figure out how we're going to separate the different chūnin candidates being sent here so the Fourth War won't start in the middle of a hotel hallway."

Kushina snickered, flicking jade eyes out her front window to where the Hokage's Tower would be if there weren't so many trees between her home and their kage's office. "That, and a few other things I've heard Minato had to deal with in the last few years, makes me glad he's the Yondaime and not me."

"Paperwork, eww." Natsumi agreed, only slightly sarcastic as she handed the book back. She had more than enough of that as it was, both useless books on random things and the ever dreaded paperwork.

Really, who needed a _guide book_ for Hot Water? It was practically all onsen resorts or spa clinics, peppered with a few random farm communities. She saw enough of it under Jiraiya's wing to be rather sure of that.

"Are you going to be okay walking home?"

"Is there another way to get there?"

Kushina, halfway to the bookcase the volume had been borrowed from, blinked back at her blankly.

"Cause I have to get home, honestly, and I'm pretty sure I'm not going to pop by walking the bare half-mile to the Nara compound. I still have to make dinner and for some reason I want cabbage." She thought about that. "Stir-fry, I think. With chicken."

"Vegetables?"

"Mostly. Last week it was radishes fried with candied ginger."

Kushina slotted the book home and then took a glance at Natsumi's seven month pregnant belly, a smirk teasing her lips. "So if Maru-chan cause you to down milk like it was going out of style, then what does this one mean?"

"That he or she probably isn't Maru-chan. Although, I'm only pretty sure of that."

She gave the former assassin a dry look in return for that.

Natsumi rolled her mismatched eyes. "Shika said we could be surprised this time. I'm going to be surprised. So no, sorry. Can't help you win that bet you've got against Mayuko on what gender Shika-baby number two is."

Kushina snorted, but whether over the unimaginative name Natsumi had bestowed her baby bump or the unhelpful nature of her comment was questionable. "Seriously though."

"It's like, less than I walk every morning within my clan's compound. And just in case I might happen to lose my way, I'm pretty sure one of the multiple guards I've got will graciously volunteer to guide me safely home."

Much to the confusion of three-fourths of the village a nearly always present Nara guard and Leopard Summons, two ANBU shadows, and just about every Uchiha MP she passed would count themselves as one of Natsumi's guards. Which didn't include the odd Hyūga, Akimichi, or Yamanaka she encountered that made it more than obvious they were keeping an eye on her for as long as she was nearby.

If she hadn't been kidnapped the first time she was pregnant, she might have protested the scrutiny.

Stag alone kept a rotating shift of guards on her and she was getting rather familiar with Shikaku's second cousin, who normally just coordinated the Nara compound guardsmen. Her two Leopard guards were rather amused that they were probably only Summoned just for show. Akira was less so that Tsuyoshi, but her father had been killed the last time their Summoner had been pregnant. Now Akira had to continually remind Tsuyoshi that they weren't just there to eat a few pounds of fish or nap most of the day away, but it looked as if that was the most of what they would be doing for Natsumi.

As Konohagakure no Sato's ANBU General it made her job a bit harder than it should have been, but she had long since established a method to keep a finger on things back when Shikamaru had been only just born and Shikaku had been deployed for the final parts of the Third Great Shinobi War. She had been forced to run ANBU through her Watch Captain and the Sabotage and Seduction Commanders, curtailing any attempt to visit the subterranean headquarters while everyone insisted on keeping her location so visible.

Natsumi was pretty sure her poor ANBU rookies were confused and a little scared of her sudden total disappearance from the halls of their HQ, and her veteran agents were probably not helping things at all. The ghost rumor was _still_ rather popular.

Kushina rolled her eyes at her. "You complain, but I know you're rather pleased with all the fuss."

"Well, yeah. Have you seen this thing?" The Nara's Lady gestured to her belly, which she could already use as a shelf if she wanted. "I can't do more than waddle right now."

"I'll give you that." Eyeing said feature, the wife of the Yondaime pursed her lips. "I'm not too sure I want to go through that again…"

"You're thinking about it?"

"Possibly. Maybe after Naru-kun starts his genin career." Kushina glanced to the hallway, calculating just how much time their respective sons actually needed to wash their hands. "If you two want to stop eavesdropping, we'll get going already."

Naruto, without an ounce of shame for being caught out, bolted to his mother's side with a broad grin. Shikamaru followed in his wake, ambling in a stroll carefully copied from his father more than anything.

"Ramen!" Cheered the bouncing blond boy, giving his godmother a bright grin of her own. "Hi Sumi-ba-chan!"

Natsumi blinked at him with a smile of her own. "Hello Naru-chan. Ramen?"

"Kaa-chan's taking me to Ichiraku Ramen."

"So we can make dinner later without him starving." Kushina finished for her son dryly, threading her fingers through Naruto's short hair. "I figured Minato would be late again, he has been for the last few weeks."

"So… what if someone tells Minato that his daily habits are becoming predictable and he needs to be more random?"

"I'll beat the ever living snot out of them." She informed all three of them brightly, giving Natsumi a sharper smirk than usual. "Why? Have you heard something?'

"No, of course not." The Leopard Summoner denied just as cheerfully, steering Shikamaru on towards the redhead's front door where Tsuyoshi was waiting for them and giving the two behind her a backwards wave. "At least, not until I have a few of the many guards I've got in range to help me."

(ooo000ooo)

"You're late."

"Not my fault. You've met my teammate Obito, right? He can't go a day or so without getting into something, and someone's got to ensure he can pull himself out of it." Kakashi informed his pseudo and only slightly legal nephew cheerfully, hunkering down to Shikamaru's level. "Natsu-nee said you wanted to talk to me?"

"Shouldn't you be resting? Or whatever old men do when they get back to the village?"

"…I would like you to know I found that so funny it wasn't."

Shikamaru cracked a grin for the silver haired Hatake, pushing himself upright as he gave up cloud watching on a clear day. "So…"

"So?"

"Kaa-chan's pregnant."

"I've noticed. In fact, she's been that way since late last fall." Kakashi remarked levelly, letting himself fall backwards to a seated position because he _was_ slightly tired from the mission even if he was putting off the whole resting up bit. He also manfully refrained from commenting that it was very likely said Nara baby number two had been conceived the night of his elder sister's wedding anniversary, if only to not gross out the young Nara heir he was talking to. "Did you miss that? I'm pretty sure she told you about it."

"Yeah, but… now I can sometimes _feel_ the baby move when she lets me, and kaa-chan's _fat_."

Snorting, the jōnin shinobi quickly checked to ensure they really were alone in the clearing of the Nara's forest. They might be only somewhat concealed from the clan head's house behind some bushes, but Kakashi was willing to bet Obito's precious goggles that they were being watched by two or more Naras at least. "For the love of the kami, Shika-chibi, _don't_ tell her that."

"I'm four, not stupid."

"Right, yes. Four." He nodded a few times, trying to recall what he was like at that age. Badgering Natsumi and his own mother for more things to learn or to be sent to the academy… probably a good thing this four-year-old was afflicted with a Nara's laziness to balance his genius. "So what about… nee-chan's being fat and pregnant is giving you fits?"

Shikamaru crossed his arms over his chest and chewed on his lower lip, trying to figure out how to phrase his problem. "I… guess it didn't really sink in? It wasn't like there was any changes until lately. What is a nii-san supposed to do, anyways?"

Kakashi was pretty sure telling the brat he should just be an older brother wouldn't go over well, and he didn't really want to piss off his sister because she had the memory to get her revenge well after she finished being pregnant and picked her katana back up. Instead, he gave it a little thought and figured out how to address the kid's confusion.

"Pitch in a little. That's pretty much it, really. If your baby sibling is being loud or fussy for no reason distract him or her for your parents." Racking his brain didn't help him more, Kakashi wasn't sure what _would_ help the young Nara heir out, so the shinobi shrugged instead. Whoever decided it had to be him doing this heart-to-heart was going to be stabbed, repeatedly. "Recall when we taught you about instinctive reactions like flinching? This is another instinctive reaction, but you'll only really understand when you finally get a good look at your baby sibling."

Heaving a sigh for the unhelpful advice, Shikamaru ran his thumb along his jawline like he had watched his father do many times before when thinking on something complicated. "That doesn't help, Kashi-ji."

Kakashi shrugged again, a bit distracted on thinking about who he could foist his little nephew off on. Itachi maybe? Damn Kochi for going to visit his brother with his own damn brat, he was both a father and a big brother and could've handled this easily. "Why worry? It's just something that you have to experience for yourself before you really understand."

"You can say that now because you're already a nii-san." Shikamaru gave the older male the look he thought that deserved, scowling up at him just because. "Think back, all those many years ago, when _you_ were about to become one and tell me what you now thought you should have been told then."

"You know, these cracks against my age make me less likely to help you out."

"I'll tell kaa-chan what _really_ happened to the tea set Tsunade-sama gave her when she was on mission to Kiri, and that Obito-san had nothing to do with it."

"Your blackmailing skills are good, remind me to admire them when they're not being used against me."

"Let's see, it involved you and said tea set and a runaway Dog Summons by the name of Bisuke."

Kakashi blinked slowly as he processed that, he had been _sure_ the brat had been a little too young to really recall that incident in any useable detail. It had been a whole year ago, should he be more interested in the now? "Alright, don't be so hasty. Nose plugs."

Shikamaru blinked back at him, confused. "Nose plugs?"

"Babies _stink_, Shika-chibi. I really did wish someone had informed me to find a decent set of nose plugs before Midori-chan was born." Giving an eye-smile to ensure the kid knew he was being sincere, Kakashi shrugged and ruffled his own hair with both hands. "Other than that, I was a little too fascinated to really care about what I did or didn't know about being a nii-san."

"Huh…"

"Then again, I did have a rather awesome if kind of mean role model. Natsu-nee helped me through some of it, and the rest I picked up on my own."

A twitching in the Nara heir's left eye informed the older Hatake that maybe that didn't help enough to get him off the blackmailing hook.

"You know who else you can ask? Itachi-san and Ibiki. They both are nii-sans as well, they might be able to help you out more than I can."

"Itachi-san's on mission, diplomat guard. He's not expected back for another few weeks." Shikamaru informed him tartly. "But... Ibiki-ji-san? Really?"

"Really. I think his otouto is about to graduate from the academy sometime this winter, actually. Since said otouto is still alive, and Ibiki is still on good terms with him, then he's a valid source of information."

After a long moment staring at the man, the younger boy huffed. "If that's what you're judging by so you can shove me off onto someone else, you have very low standards."

"Hey."

"I could also go up to random kids at the park and ask them the next time tou-chan takes me just to escape kaa-chan's mood swings, but you wouldn't want your little nephew doing that, right?"

"My cute little nephew _also_ just tried to blackmail me."

"So? We're ninja, it's what we do."

"Point, except you're not a shinobi just yet… and I now have something to hold over your head, that you tried to blackmail me."

Instead of getting surprised or disgruntled, Shikamaru just smirked in his face. "Kaa-chan would only be amused with me after getting irritated with you, and tou-chan would say that's what you get for breaking her favorite tea set then lying about it, badly. Out of luck there, Kashi-ji. I don't care if you try to tell them, because then we'd have to tell them what really happened to kaa-chan's tea set to the point that I could use it as blackmail."

The silver haired Hatake clan head rubbed his cloth covered chin thoughtfully. "Hmm… I foresee a problem with that."

"Maybe you do. I've apparently got to go ask kaa-chan if we can go visit Ibiki-ji-san. Somehow, without letting her know why."

Distracted from trying to find a way to inform Natsumi that her son was a little free with his coercion attempts without getting himself in trouble, Kakashi gifted the younger kid with a confused look. "Why?"

"Because." Deciding the older shinobi was a lost cause, and it hadn't really been his best option to begin with, Shikamaru decided to be just as unhelpful. Getting up, and brushing the odd twig and leaf off himself, he started back to the house to find something a little more interesting than staring up at a cloudless sky to do.

"That's all you're going to say?"

"You want more? Give more."

Smoothly rising to his full height, the Hatake ambled along after him and offered something before they reached the house. "Ask before you pick your baby whatever up. Apparently their neck and head are fragile for the first few months. Have Natsu-nee show you how to handle your soon-to-be-sibling if kaa-chan or Aikido-baa-sama aren't there."

Shikamaru thought about it, but it was something even if he was sure his mother would've warned him about it before it could possibly be a problem. "I don't want kaa-chan to know because I already said I'd be alright with it a few months ago."

"Don't want to seem as if you lied?"

"Something like that, and Ino-chan was talking a few days ago. About how excited I had to be with an impending sibling coming soon, and everything she would've done if it had been her kaa-chan."

"Hmm, listening to a _girl's_ gossip? For _shame_, Shika-chibi."

"Yeah well, stuff it."

Strike one. Shikamaru wasn't too clear on what the strike was against, but since his mother tended to mutter it as a count of when she ran into a dead end he figured it was something to express her displeasure.

Either way, habit caused him to think it.

(ooo000ooo)

Shikamaru wasn't surprised when mom opted out of the evening training session.

She had done it for the last two weeks as well, so he at least expected her to do it.

Instead of going inside, though, his mom settled on the porch with Tsuyoshi at her back to watch dad instruct Shikamaru in the Nara clan's taijutsu in the fading twilight.

Which resulted in two very distracted Naras, because dad kept glancing over to where mom was lounging instead of concentrating on his son and heir's efforts to hit him. Given that even distracted he was still more of a match for Shikamaru's clumsy taijutsu skills, the Nara clan head could probably afford the distractions unlike how badly it was effecting Shikamaru's skills.

However, when he ended up _tucked under one of the older Nara's arms_ for a whole two minutes just so he could check on mom, Shikamaru was willing to give up on taijutsu practice for the night only ten minutes into the training session.

Mom laughing at him and his predicament didn't help a whole lot.

After another hour or so of clumsy attempts to at least touch his dad, a failure to do so that grated a little because the older Nara was more than just a little distracted and he still failed to do more than tire himself out, the two of them ended up with mom and her Leopard on the porch instead of trying to use the end of the two hours for more training.

Instead, the three of them watched the shadows of the Nara's forest bend and twist under the control of their fellow clansmen. Shikamaru was content to do so only because his mom was running her claws lightly through his hair while they watched.

He wasn't entirely certain when he fell asleep, but then it didn't really matter. He was still working out how much napping time he needed to counter the early mornings and late nights, therefore falling asleep unexpectedly was allowed at his age.

\V/

"Naras are so _lazy_."

"What was your first clue?" Shikamaru asked without even opening his eyes, content to mostly ignore this heckler. He was still tired, and not particularly willing to give up his comfy spot just to deal with whoever it was getting snotty.

Chouji sighing behind him let the Nara heir know that whoever it had been wouldn't be chased off so easily. Neji seemed content to huff in all his stuffy clan superiority, ignoring the interloper the best the six-year-old could.

Cracking a yellow eye open, because for whatever reason the yellow unnerved the younger Uchiha clansmen, he gave the Uchiha kid his best impression of his dad's '_what_ are you _on_' look.

Sasuke was giving his cousin whatever his best Uchiha MP look as well in a decent attempt to scare the brat off, but apparently the second son of the Uchiha clan head wasn't nearly as scary as that clan's heir. Up until the soon to be five-year-old Inuzuka Kiba barreled his way past the brat and knocked him off his feet.

"Kaa-san said yes to a birthday party!" The dog boy all but shouted at the top of his lungs, skidding to a halt with the help of the Akimichi heir keeping him on his own feet. Looking back to the kid he knocked over, Kiba sniffed in mock disdain. "Dude, really. You don't have to fall over yourself, ya know. Sasuke will bring you if you really want to come that badly."

Snorting, the young Uchiha that was somewhat tolerable stepped on the back of the not-tolerable one. "I think not. He requires a bit more polishing before we allow him out of the clan's compound."

Shikamaru privately betted with himself over Sasuke copying that word for word from his brother. "You're going to get your dog this time, Kiba-san?"

"Finally, yeah. Then we'll see what nee-chan's three can do against me and _my_ dog! …or dog_s_. Ya know, depending."

Neji gave him a flat stare but Chouji was the one who paused to give the Inuzuka a questioning look. "Won't your dog actually be a puppy? …or pupp_ies_?"

"Aww… crap. That's right." Kiba looked disappointed for all of a moment before shrugging that off easily enough. "Whatever. We'll just have to train up a bit before, that's all."

Sasuke got bored of keeping his balance on his struggling clansmen's back, even if he was rude, hopping off to give his attention to his guests. "Will your okaa-san allow us into the kennels again, Kiba-kun?"

"Everyone but Shikamaru, probably."

Shikamaru didn't really care, because as far as he was concerned Akira and Tsuyoshi were better than any old dog. Out of all the things his mom could teach him, what the Nara heir had his sights solidly on was her Summoning Contract. "I'd prefer a nap instead, so no thanks."

"You're so weird. But awesome, kinda." Kiba hastened to tack on, giving the Uchiha that had been trying to heckle the young Nara heir a teasing look and a toothy grin. Proving that knocking him over hadn't been as much of an accident as it could have been. "Even if you do smell of cat."

"Are we waiting on anyone else?" Shikamaru asked instead of answering, keenly intent on getting a bit more sleep to make up for that morning's training session. If he wouldn't be left alone to do that here, then he wanted to go to the Uchiha clan head's home instead and do it there.

"Hinata-hime and Ino-chan." Sasuke informed him seriously before Neji could, because as the second son of Fugaku it was his job to keep track of important if young guests in his clan's home grounds. "Then we can go see what okaa-chan has for us to eat before lunch."

"What about Naru-kun?" He had to ask, because as his god-brother it was his job to watch the blond's back.

Kiba was his god-brother as well, but more of a dog-brother that yelled way too much.

Sasuke looked a little disgruntled, as he always was when the son of the Yondaime was mentioned. "He's not here today. He's with his Otou-sama."

(ooo000ooo)

"I don't know why, but I'm more tired now than I was when only just pregnant with Maru-chan." Natsumi informed Mikoto, browsing through her fridge as she plated up some snacks for the clan kids she volunteered to watch that day.

The Uchiha genjutsu mistress ignored the Nara pawing through her fridge, they had all gotten used to the pregnant former assassin getting into another's fridge the last time around and it was easier to ignore if you had once gone through the craving part of pregnancy yourself. "The baby is a Nara, why are you surprised?"

"Second pregnancy was supposed to be easier, remember?"

"You weren't as sick this time around, were you?"

"Well, no." Natsumi allowed thoughtfully, closing the Uchiha's fridge with carrots in hand. "That's true, I suppose."

Mikoto left the snacks where they were, seating herself at the kitchen table with the ANBU General and accepting the carrot stick held out for her.

Natsumi had never gotten over the impulse to feed those around her when she sought something to eat. It was reassuring, in the same way the sun would always rise and the rivers would always flow. Natsumi would always feed you if you were in reach, even if it was your own food.

Snapping off the tip of her own carrot with her teeth, the Uchiha kunoichi watched as the Nara one munched on her own for a few minutes. "So, done with your errands?"

"For now, yeah. I'll take Maru-chan home with me if he wants, but there's still the paperwork I'll never get out of doing even on my deathbed."

"Ah, paperwork. The dreaded end of all competent ninja." Mikoto smirked around her carrot, giving her fellow kunoichi a wry look. "I have more than enough of my own to do, you won't find any sympathy here."

"They ought to warn academy kids of this crap. Become a shinobi, fight for your village for all of ten years and then forever battle the evils of bureaucracy!"

Masterfully controlling the snort, the Uchiha's Lady discarded the remains of her carrot and rose to snag the plate of snacks she had made for the clan children in her care. Natsumi sighed and broke off the nibbled end of her carrot using her nails for leverage, quickly popping the bit into her mouth and leaving the rest on the table with Mikoto's.

The children spilled into the Uchiha's formerly quiet home with a loud thump, because apparently Hinata tripped Kiba when the Inuzuka brat somehow upset Ino and Neji prevented her from joining him on the ground. The boy ended up trampled when Sasuke didn't care if he was in the way and Chouji didn't realize he was there, and getting stepped on by an Akimichi, however unknowingly or young said Akimichi was, hurt like hell.

Shikamaru, grass stained and a little rumpled already, looked pathetically grateful she was there to pick him up.

Hinata tried to sound serene and calming as she fussed over the pile-up, but the amused tilt to her lips gave away the lie. Luckily for her Kiba wasn't the sharpest tack in the box, and probably wouldn't ever be, so since Ino was calming down now that the Hyūga heiress had gained her some revenge the kids allowed themselves to be lulled by the Uchiha's Lady's snacks instead of quarreling over how the trip-up happened. Neji practically radiated smug approval for his clan's heiress' actions while she pretended wistful ignorance of said actions, Sasuke just smirked like the brat he was, Ino sat as close to Hinata's protective presence as she could, while Shikamaru and a bruised Kiba reassured Chouji that stepping on the Inuzuka boy wasn't really that big of a deal.

Mikoto gave Natsumi a pointed look over the kids' heads.

Once snack time was over with, the Nara's Lady volunteered to take the Yamanaka and Akimichi heirs home with her and Shikamaru.

Because the Uchiha genjutsu mistress had to have her hands full with the Hyūga kids in the Uchiha compound and Natsumi didn't envy her that task at all.

She did overhear something that made her wonder, though, just before they left the house.

Shikamaru cornered Sasuke instead of joining Chouji near the door to wait on Ino, giving the young Uchiha the most serious look he could. "When is your nii-san due home?"

"Mission parameters indicated at least a week in field, not counting traveling time, nii-sama should be home later this week or early next." Carefully pronouncing the long and somewhat tricky words just made the youngest son of Mikoto's sound three shades of adorable, but her own son just grunted.

"Tell him I have a question for him, not urgent but something that needs addressing."

Sasuke nodded solemnly, probably because his big brother was an heir of a shinobi clan and so was the young Nara he was talking to. Being his brother's social secretary probably wasn't something he was too enthused with, but it did sound somewhat important. "I will."

Natsumi was confused and a little curious. What did her son need to talk to Itachi about?

\V/

"Stealing your gaki, nee-chan!" Kakashi hollered into the house as he snagged Shikamaru.

"Oi!"

Ignoring the objection, the Hatake clan head swung the young Nara up to sit on his shoulders and hoofed it as fast as he could out of the Nara clan compound.

"Just so you know, I'm only doing this so you'll never tell Natsu-nee about the tea set thing."

"Deal." Shikamaru informed him blandly, gripping silver hair hard as the village blurred past the two of them.

Kakashi only slowed when they reached the main street of the village, dropping down to the civilian foot traffic as easily as any Leaf shinobi worth their hitai-ate. With his perch on the admittedly very tall Hatake's shoulders, the Nara heir could see exactly where they were going.

Most children wouldn't be very pleased with a trip to T&I's headquarters, but Shikamaru wasn't just any kid.

The silver haired shinobi was just any ninja either, he got the admittedly strange duo past most of the security checks rather easily. The truth was sometimes stranger than fiction, and Kakashi excelled in bullshitting enough to use the truth when it suited him.

Right on up until they encountered the Head of Intelligence only feet from their target, at least.

Inoichi-ji-san wasn't as easily circumvented. "Does Natsu know he's here?"

"She knows I have him." Kakashi informed the famed interrogator with all the nonchalance he could muster on demand. It was a lot from the Nara heir's point of view.

"But not that he's here. Why?" Inoichi pressed on, looking a cross between bemused and concerned.

"I'm being blackmailed."

The Yamanaka clan head stared blankly at him, then gave Shikamaru his attention rather than try to extract answers out of the notoriously twisted shinobi he was being carried by. "Maru-chan? Why are you two here?"

"To see Ibiki-ji-san." It wasn't his fault, Kakashi started it.

"I see." Even as he said it, the shinobi frowned at them both as if he couldn't.

Sometimes, dealing with Yamanakas gave Shikamaru a headache. Why couldn't they ever say what they really thought? Ino had the same problem her dad did.

"Well… he's on break for the next ten minutes still, I suppose-"

"Great! Thanks! Bye!" Kakashi chirped with faux cheerfulness, whisking them both down the hall to Morino Ibiki's office in the Torture and Intelligence building. Shikamaru did his part by waving lazily at his uncle as they bolted pass.

Ibiki wasn't any more amused than Inoichi to see them there.

"I'm being blackmailed," Kakashi informed him with all due seriousness, patting the Nara heir on his head once he plunked the kid down on one of the chairs in the office before ducking right back out of the room, "you two have fun."

The interrogator stared at the son of his old jōnin-sensei, then at his office door. "He abandoned you here, didn't he?"

Shikamaru shrugged dismissively. "Probably."

Sighing heavily, the massive shinobi gave up on what he was working on to lean back in his chair and stare flatly at the four-year-old that had been suddenly dumped on him. "Blackmail?"

"Kaa-chan's tea set."

Ibiki looked intrigued enough that the little Nara informed him exactly what Kakashi had wrangled his silence on. Unfortunately for the Hatake clan head, Shikamaru had only agreed not to tell his mom about it. Natsumi's second fūinjutsu apprentice and old genin student agreed that it was an oversight he would be delighted to help his fellow jōnin out with, with a nasty grin that he probably shouldn't be giving a four-year-old.

There was a reason Ibiki-ji-san was Shikamaru's second favorite uncle out of the lot of them he had, and not just because he was the most normal one.

Arranging to take the young boy back home took a little doing, but Ibiki strolled out of the T&I building with Shikamaru ambling close on his heels within an hour of getting the Nara heir dumped on him.

"So what did you want to see me about?"

"I'm going to be a nii-san. What does a nii-san do, anyways?" Shikamaru asked him with all the confusion he had gained over the topic.

"Pitch in." Ibiki grumped sourly, glowering a path through the afternoon traffic they were wandering through.

The Nara heir gave his broad back a flat look. "That's exactly what Kashi-ji said."

It was enough to prick Ibiki's touchy pride, and the scowl on the shinobi's face got that much darker from how far it was clearing their way. "A nii-san is supposed to protect the otouto the best he can, and guard his imouto from other boys. Good enough for you?"

"I guess."

It was something different at least, and more than he had before going to see the interrogator. Shikamaru figured that would be the best he could get from the adults around him, his last hope was the Uchiha heir.

Strike number two.

Now, how to explain this adventure to his mom?

Or worse yet, his dad when Inoichi-ji told him of it?

(ooo000ooo)

Mom opting out of the nightly training sessions again wasn't surprising at all, but at least dad managed it a little better that night.

Shikamaru still failed to even touch his old man during the sparring part, much to his own disgruntlement.

In the end they did actually managed to train the whole two hours, and the Nara heir ended up in a boneless slump next to his mom's hip while she leaned into their clan head.

"My feet hurt, and I didn't even _do_ anything." Natsumi informed her son with a mischievous grin.

Shikaku bent his long frame over her, giving her a steady look. "Shouldn't you be at the point of _not_ doing anything?"

"I am, and I've taken care of the last of the things I couldn't get out of. Those two, you know who, will take over the rest until I get back to it."

Shikamaru ignored the hints of whatever mysterious thing his mom did during the day with all that paperwork that appeared from nowhere, crawling into her lap next to her big baby belly because he was that tired. It was the first time he had actually trained all two night hours as well as the morning session, and he would need a bit more adjustment to his daytime napping from the look of things.

"Additionally, I wanted to ask about that comment of yours."

"What comment?"

"About making them godfather." The kunoichi informed him seriously. "Can we? They need something else, they lasted all of a year out of there before wandering back because they have nothing else."

Shikaku puzzled that over for a moment, eventually shrugging at his wife. "I want to actually meet them first. Not how we have already, I mean in the flesh without the clay."

"Alright then, godmother?"

"Mayuko. I think." The Nara clan head suggested.

"I'm fine with that. I'll ask them, or send a messenger, tomorrow."

Shikamaru drifted off to sleep before he heard what else his mom wanted to talk to his dad about.

\V/

He really should have expected it, given what mom told his dad last night.

At first, he really only liked that mom didn't seem at all that fussed to get up out of bed after they were done with the clan training and breakfast that morning.

Then Naruto barreled into the house with all the subtly of a bull in a tea shop, and Shikamaru realized what his mom meant by taking care of the last of her things she had to do.

It meant the Nara clan head's home was the designated spot to drop off other clan kids, probably until mom finally had her baby.

He was normally fine with the whole switching homes for a few hours thing, he didn't really want to be left at home with a Nara or Leopard guard or taken to the Akimichi's clan head home for a few hours. Seeing other clan compounds was interesting, and switching it all up kept all of them rather interested in learning about why it was done that way instead of how their own clans ran things. It was something to do, and they would grow up to be the next shinobi clan heads and their seconds so that knowledge might help them out later on down the line.

…or at least that was how they sold it to their respective clan elders.

However, his mom would be pregnant for another month and however long from what Tsunade-sama had said. That meant a month and however long of everyone going to the Nara clan instead of somewhere else.

A month and however long of Neji and Sasuke being stiff with each other, of Naruto somehow needling the Uchiha unknowingly, of Ino excitedly chattering to a quiet Hinata, of Kiba reeling from place to place with all the grace of a drunk, three-legged dog. All day _long._

At least Chouji knew his way around the Nara clan compound well enough not to be a bother.

Shikamaru was _doomed_. He was never going to get enough sleep this way.

Thankfully, at least, it seemed as if his mom had called in reinforcements.

Senju Tenzou and his sister Naomi had a brightly cheerful and wiggling Naruto in a firm grip long before his mom managed to make her way down the stairs.

Shikamaru wasn't sure, but he was more than certain the two of them fit into his family more as his cousins than as his uncle and aunt. He didn't know why he felt that way, but it was how he thought it should go. Tenzou and Naomi were the children of his mom's sensei, though, so they were technically his aunt and uncle rather than cousins.

At least as far as the twisted family tree was concerned.

He still needed to sit down and puzzle that thing out again, he was sure it had gotten a bit more snarled when Nagato-ji found Uzumaki Karin-san and her family in Kusagakure last summer.

"Shika-kun! Tenzou-kun's here!"

"Aa… I see that, Naru-kun." Shikamaru could be excused for his less than enthusiastic response, he was still tired and they were probably early.

If Naruto wasn't early he was always late, enough so that if you noted he was late it would be an hour or two before he showed up. It wasn't his fault, sometimes things happened and his parents got distracted on their way. There were downsides to being the son of Konohagakure no Sato's Yondaime Hokage, and being late some days was one of them. He couldn't exactly run himself around the village, any number of people would panic if he tried.

Naruto swung his small body just so, slipping from the thin sweater he had been wearing to bounce over to his lazy friend and god-brother. Tenzou blinked at the hand suddenly not holding anything but a swath of orange cloth even as his sister snickered at him and his expression.

"Kaa-chan said we'd be spending the week here. Isn't that the coolest?"

The Nara heir blinked at his god-brother as Naomi calmly strolled over to help his mom over to her couch in the study. "Just the week?"

That was a lot better than what he feared it would be.

"Yeah. For some reason, Sumi-ba-chan shouldn't be stressed more than she is." Naruto informed him with all the seriousness he could press into one statement, which was a surprising amount for a normally cheerful kid. "Cause we don't want ta cause problems with the baby."

"There can be _problems?_"

Shikamaru did not yelp. No he did not.

Tenzou coughed lightly, holding Naruto's thin orange shirt out to him. "Aa, yeah. Those. She had some with you as well, Maru-chan."

Realizing the older Senju _was_, in fact, an older brother suddenly got him the intent interest of the Nara heir pinned to him. After checking to ensure Naomi had thoroughly distracted his mom, that is.

First things first. "What kind of problems?"

"You cost her a kidney." The Mokuton user informed him blandly. "That also caused you to be born almost a month early, truth be known. As far as I'm aware, and this is what I know from living with both Hahaue and Naomi, all they're really concerned over this time is that she doesn't incur any additional internal damage. From what I know about her being pregnant with you, she had just come out of the last of the major fighting in the Third War before getting pregnant and that's why she lost the kidney she did."

Naruto poked the older shinobi in the chest with one finger. "Four years old. Four. Years. Old. Try that again, but keep in mind you're talking ta four-year-olds."

Tenzou gave the blond kid a pointed look. "I know perfectly well you understood that, but if you must. They want her to be as lazy as any good Nara, otherwise she might have this one early too."

"Naras aren't lazy, we're conservative." Shikamaru informed him with a smirk. "We're conserving energy."

The Senju snorted, but Naruto actually took that seriously.

"Conserving energy for what?"

Giving his occasionally insightful if a little thick god-brother a smirk of his own, the Nara heir shrugged unhelpfully. "Tradition."

It was, after all, tradition that no one but Naras, Yamanakas, and Akimichis know when the Nara clan trained. Not even his mom had gone against that one.

The Namikaze scowled at him for all of a moment, until Kiba tromped in full to bursting with ideas he wanted kicked around for his birthday party and he got thoroughly distracted. Tsume and her Kuromaru both gave a nod of recognition to the Senju kneeling at the Nara heir's side before they left the Inuzuka boy with the blond.

"Tenzou-kun? Can I ask-" Shikamaru double-checked that his mom was distracted before turning back. "you a question?"

"Sure?"

"What does a nii-san do, anyways?"

Rocking back on his heels, the shinobi gave the son of his neko-taicho a long look. "May I ask who have you asked that of already?"

"Kashi-ji and Ibiki-ji-san."

"Err, Shikamaru-kun… Kakashi-sama is a shinobi who can say a lot without saying much of anything, and Ibiki-san is a man of few words to say the least."

"I noticed."

Tenzou smirked wryly at that tart comment, steering the young Nara on to keep both Kiba and Naruto in his sight while they talked. "Well then, what did they tell you?"

"Pitch in and protect them. Which was all well and good, but not much help." Shikamaru informed him with all the bruised pride of a kid who went out of his way for something that didn't pay off as well as he'd like. Explaining his jaunt to T&I alone had given him a decent amount of trouble, and he was still sure Kakashi would make him pay for telling Ibiki about the tea set thing. "Oh… and Kashi-ji wanted someone to tell him to pick up nose-plugs before Midori-chan was born."

"That _is_ what a nii-san does, you know… except for the nose-plug thing. I'm pretty sure that's just a canine sense of smell thing. Hana-san has said the same thing."

Stalling out on that point, the Nara stared at the Senju.

Tenzou sighed. "So it isn't so much a question of what to do you are confused by, but more of a 'what it will mean for you' that confuses you. Am I right?"

"Huh… yeah."

Shikamaru turned that over in his head, but refrained from asking Tenzou what he thought when he was about to become a nii-san.

The reason why the Nara was sure the two youngest Senju clansmen fit in more as cousins than aunt and uncle was because no one ever spoke of Tenzou's or Naomi's early years.

The only ones that had 'you were so cute at that age' stories about them was his own mother and the Yondaime's secretary, a one-legged ex-shinobi named Ito-san they respected highly for some reason.

The last time anyone foolish enough actually tried to comment on those years they got a face full of very irritated Leopard Summoner and one pissed off Toad Sage. Admittedly the young idiot had tried to tell Naomi she had been hidden for most of her life because she was a disgrace to the Senju name, as if her lack of Senju clan features mattered when her own brother was the one to bring the Mokuton kekkai genkai back into the clan. His mom had claimed she was pissed that her reasons for hiding the two of them for the Slug Princess and her sensei was referred to in such a way and Jiraiya claimed he was pissed his daughter was slandered in such a way for taking after her Uzumaki ancestors more. Tsunade had just been pissed off, and rumors abounded that she might have smashed her desk by trying to set down her coffee mug when she heard of the incident.

Those were reasons to react to that how they had, but Shikamaru had also heard what his mom had said to Naomi much later in both the Toad Sage's and Slug Princess' hearing. That the brat 'couldn't know' so she shouldn't give his words any weight.

Couldn't know about _what_… was something he wasn't too sure he wanted to know about. Especially with how serious it had all seemed at the time.

Shikamaru did at least know it wasn't quite as it seemed, more than probably most the village did. They seemed perfectly happy with it however it was, so he knew it wasn't his problem to dig into.

"Thanks, Tenzou-kun."

The Mokuton user spared him a pleasant grin, before using his ever so vaunted kekkai genkai to separate the Namikaze and Inuzuka boys before their little scuffle spilled into the Nara's forest.

Then hung them there in the air until Naruto apologized and Kiba gave a sheepish one of his own to Shikamaru, because they were his guests and they had been fighting without allowing him the time to play mediator.

Shikamaru sighed, resigned himself for doing that most of the next week, and set about convincing Tenzou to let them down.

\V/

He didn't recall Sasuke's tidbit of his older brother's whereabouts until he got face to face with the Uchiha heir himself.

Honestly, he had been a bit full up trying to juggle his naptime requirements and a nearly overflowing house full of other clan kids… and not stressing his mom out. There was a new kid in the group to try and placate, the daughter of an old friend of his mom's named Sakura-chan that preferred spending time with either Hinata or Ino, and an Inuzuka getting more hyper by the day setting off and egging on the already hyper Namikaze to watch. Shikamaru had his hands full, and would be very grateful for the last month of his mom's pregnancy being free of the others at least.

Itachi didn't seem to mind drifting around the Nara heir until the younger kid got his wits together again, that was a plus at least.

"So I had a question. It was 'what does a nii-san even do', but after talking to Tenzou-kun it turned into 'what will it mean'." Shikamaru informed his fellow clan heir as seriously as he could, feeling a little ragged over the whole topic already. "Can you help?"

"Aa…"

The Nara belatedly recalled Itachi was another of those that could be described as someone of few words. He should have asked Tenzou when he had the chance.

"It's not so much what it will mean for you, but what you want it to mean for them." The Uchiha surprised him by answering rather cryptically. "Do you want your younger sibling to look up to you as a shinobi? As a protector? Or maybe a mentor, even? No matter what, you will be his or her nii-san. What do you want it to mean to your younger sibling?"

Shikamaru thought about that for a long moment, giving the older chuunin a nod. "Thanks, Itachi-san."

Leave it to an Uchiha to twist a question back in on itself, but it did give the Nara something to think about.

\V/

Shikamaru stewed over the question for another week, then tried to answer it the week after.

Then his mom's water broke, right in the middle of the Chūnin Exams, and he didn't have the time to ponder it anymore.

At least she did go into labor in the middle of the Chūnin Exams and not at the beginning or end, which meant everyone had a moment or two to attend the birth of the Nara clan head's second child.

His dad had to go get his hand broken, from what his godmother dryly informed him of when he reached the waiting room of the hospital, so Shikamaru spent some decent time with his godfather and his favorite uncle.

Who then proved himself the Nara heir's favorite uncle all over again when he rather easily solved the question that had been nagging at him for months.

Minato smirked rather broadly when hearing the little Nara's problem. "Speaking as one of those otoutos that had a _nee_-chan to look up to, my favorite part was the fact she would spend her time on me first. Sempai always checked up on me, even if she tended to leave me to my own devices most of the time. What you should do is rather like what you kaa-chan did for me. Be there, even if only to pick on him or her. You don't really have to do too much more, at least not as long as your kaa-chan and tou-san are there."

Shikamaru let his forehead hit his godfather's knee out of pure exasperation.

He had been asking the wrong half of the sibling equation the whole time?

A rusty chuckle drew his attention over to his sibling's soon-to-be godfathers, a pair of shinobi, twins in fact, by the names Ichirou and Jirou. The younger was the one with scars cutting into the right side of his face, Jirou, and the man nodded his agreement to the Yondaime's answer.

Given they were twins and their names meant 'first son' and 'second son' respectively had caused his dad to remark that their parents had the worst kind of humor imaginable when he met the two of them.

Worse, the two of them had agreed rather dryly as well.

It was typical of what his mom tended to think was funny, anyways, so it wasn't too surprising she had wanted them as godfathers.

Shortly after Minato proved himself superior to all the other uncles the little Nara had, Shikamaru actually met his new sibling.

Then he realized what Kashi-ji had been talking about when Shikaina blinked grey eyes at him sleepily from the crook of their dad's arm. The arm that didn't have a broken hand, anyways.

Huh, he had an imouto.

"You're not even an hour old, and already you're so troublesome."


	8. Missing Scene in Part Five

**Author's Note** : Two things, people. First of all, for those of you who have asked about it, I did recently sit down and plot out the twisted family tree thing almost in it's entirety. Problem is, the thing exists in about three dimensions and cannot exist in any physically flat surface in it's entirety because the damn thing _loops back on itself in multiple ways_.

No, I'm not kidding. I'd even swear the Rookie Nine is the unholy trifecta of the damned knotted thing, because through that alone _everyone_ is eventually related to their own parents somehow. Some actually end up as the parents of a set of their (technically) _own parents_, horrifyingly enough.

I have _three flow charts_ with only parts of it mapped out, because just one cannot contain the damn thing even partially and that was only Konohagakure's side of things. One by bloodlines, one by the four generations of Team Seven, one of the stretch Team Nine reaches across. The ends of all three looks like a rainbow vomited all over everything (which I've plotted to the _seventh generation_ from Senju Hashirama to Nara Shikaina), to the point I can barely make out who is situated where or what part of the tree I was looking at.

Take Senju Tsunade, for example. (The summary of this mess is the sentence below it if you lose your way. Kind of me, if confusing as hell, I know. The paragraph after isn't much better.)

By legal rights she's the current head of the Senju clan, adoptive mom of Tenzou and Naomi as well as Nawaki's elder sister. Also through Jiraiya, who would be her sort of consort hilariously enough, Natsumi's mom in a way of her being Jiraiya's main lady (by law since they jointly adopted the two experimentation survivors of Orochimaru's and are connected that way if you don't want to think of them together). Which would make Natsumi's children her grandkids, and since Kushina is a cousin of whatever sort the great-aunt of Naruto then that goes through Minato to Natsumi in an actually legal sense already. However, since Tenzou and Naomi were Natsumi's kids through the whole S-rank secret thing, that would make those two Shikamaru's and Shikaina's uncle and aunt as well as their siblings in a way. To make it even more twisty, though, since Hiruzen is Natsumi's grandfather through her sensei (in this technicality Jiraiya is married to his own damn sister, disturbingly enough) it would also make Tsunade the Nara children's great-aunt _twice_. Even worse, through Tenzou's status as Mikoto's genin student, it would also link Itachi and Sasuke through then loop back to Naruto as Sasuke's teammate, up to Minato as Naruto's dad, divert a bit because then she's related to her own cousin Kushina this way as well the actual way, back to Natsumi since she and Minato pretty much adopted each other, and then right on back to her own clan again even if you took a detour through the Sarutobi part of the tree simply for the view. Then you end up relating Tsunade to herself twice as well, three times if you take the _really_ loopy way back. This doesn't include godchildren relations, Komushi's connections in either direction, _or_ even Asuma being Kochi's younger brother and _his_ connections through his own genin team, or the Hatake twist and turns back through via the Uchiha clan by Obito and Shisui then up to Kagami across to _Shimura Danzō_ up to Tobirama across to Hashirama then back down through Hiruzen across to Koharu down to Sakumo again if you didn't take the off ramp at the First Hokage… or even the Second. (That's all part of one person's branches in the damn thing, in about the fifty other people I've linked it all through to.)

So depending on what branch of the twisted family tree you go up (or up then down then up, or… you get the point, right?), Tsunade is Shikamaru's cousin whatever times removed, or his great-aunt, or his grandma. Depending… or possibly all at the same time.

And I wasn't even done yet, because through the even more technical part of the twisted family tree (Tsunade – [as by blood sibling] – Nawaki – [as by teammate rights {who was also Natsumi's subordinate for a short while too}] – Team Nine – [as by genin to jōnin-sensei semi-legal rights] + [as the sister of her {technical} son is her daughter too kind of thing]) Natsumi could probably call Tsunade daughter and sister _and_ mom _and_ aunt in a way and it branches off again from there for the younger generation. Which doesn't include Kakashi, as both Natsumi's little bro and Minato's kind of son even if the three of them are siblings in a way. Kakashi is also Shikamaru's uncle and Naruto's dad and uncle and sibling then back to Shikamaru's sibling too then to Natsumi's kid as well, Jiraiya's grandkid and great nephew _and_ nephew _and_ son, which would make Natsumi then Sakumo's sister in a way, then Eri's sister-in-law as well, and aunt to her own little brother. Just to be that much more confusing you'd have to then look at where that would leave poor Shikamaru and Shikaina, as siblings of their grandmother Tsunade and great aunt and uncle to their uncle Kakashi…

Even worse, Nagato and Kisame somehow fall into this mess somewhere but I lost them in the quagmire of twisty colors just before I gave up. :"(

No, it doesn't get any better from there.

Welcome to my headache.

Take a string, hopelessly knot the middles together a few times, tangle the rest of it up, put a few more knots in wherever you'd like, and end up with three looped tips and a snarled, dense mess of another end. Voila… a fraction of the twisted family tree (seriously, that's all just Tsunade's part). If you have a loose end you get bonus points, because that's Komushi's end in Suna just waiting for something else to happen and claim about two or three more family lines just to make it all that much more exotic. And no, Sasori is already doomed since the two of them qualify for the whole Leaf shinobi teammate rights already…

Secondly, this part has been edited and censored.

Yes, there are naughty things going on. No hardcore porn, if you were wondering. Mostly why most of this scene was skipped over when I was writing out the main story.

Obviously, that part cannot appear on the _fanficdotnet_ version of the story but is available in it's entirety on _AO3_. If you don't want to see that, since Natsumi's only sixteen in body age and Shikaku's only just seventeen and some people do judge even if they're going to be married in as little as half a year in story, you don't have to. If you do, you know where it's at.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Part Five :<strong>__ The events behind Scene 19 – Natsumi sleeping over at the Nara compound_

_(FYI : this is while Minato and Kushina were getting cozy in Natsumi's new jōnin apartment so she spends the night at the Nara clan's compound with Shikaku, details of which are mentioned in __**Part Seventeen : Change of Plans Part 2**_ _Scene 19)_

Nara Shikaku had expected a quiet night.

As far as he knew, there wasn't anything too major going on either in the village or in his clan so he pretty much had the rest of the afternoon and night to himself.

He knew full well that as the heir of the Nara clan he wouldn't avoid getting jōnin rank very long, but the lack of things he had seen Minato and Natsumi have to deal with already made lingering as long as he could at a lower rank appealing. There was a certain operational security in being only a chūnin, clan affiliated or not, something he was taking shameless advantage of while he could.

He snagged himself something dry and technical to read, then tossed himself on his bed to waste away a half an hour or so until he was tired enough to nap a bit before finding himself something to eat.

It was how he managed to pass little more than ten minutes, then he suddenly got a lapful of a very particular, recently promoted jōnin kunoichi.

Who just so happened to be his fiancée.

Shikaku swallowed a swearword and released his kagemane no jutsu so he didn't impale his soon-to-be-wife… and then his hormones caught up to the situation.

Mesuji Natsumi batted her lashes at him, leaning forward, pouting slightly, and breathing slightly hard from whatever she had been doing before diving through his bedroom's open window. Most of all, and more importantly as far as his mind was concerned, she was sitting astride his lap _in his bed_.

"Can I ask a favor?"

Shikaku was a perfectly healthy young man, and his equally healthy and pretty fiancée was perched on his lap pouting at him. He was sure the place his mind went wasn't what she was talking about, but he couldn't really help it. "Uh… Natsu?"

She sat fully _upright_, her pout turned into a thoughtful frown as she looked out the window she used to get into his room. "I… err… need a place to stay for a few hours. I would've crashed Minato's apartment, but he recently moved and I don't know if I'm included in what seals he's got up now. And he's a little distracted at the moment, which is why I need somewhere else besides my new apartment, so I can't freaking ask in the first place."

The kunoichi turned back to blink her mismatched eyes at him in an attempt of an overblown begging pose she probably though was more amusing than actually seductive. "Please?"

Shikaku firmly reminded himself that the physically young woman in his lap was both an assassin and an ANBU agent, who could probably kill him no matter how underdressed she seemed to be at the moment.

It didn't exactly help him much.

Then he reminded himself of her rather unique history, and that she was actually older than she looked, but he got sidetracked as her chest hitched when she took a deeper than normal breath to regain her control over it.

…_bouncy_…

Dragging his eyes off her chest before she noted where he was getting distracted, Shikaku instead focused on her mismatched eye coloring. "…okay. Do you want a guest room… or something?"

He could do that, there were four bedroom in his childhood home. His parents had one, this was another, and there were two made up for anyone who ended up spending the night. The one Chouza and Inoichi used when they ended up sleeping over was already ready for anyone that needed it.

That way he wouldn't get tempted to offer his own bed for the kunoichi to use, though he knew full well he would still think about it.

"Guest room?" Natsumi cocked her head, surprised. "What's wrong with wasting some time right here? It's not like I'm going to need more than a few hours, and it's not even dark yet."

"Here?" The Nara managed in something approaching a strangled tone of voice.

"Well… yeah. I mean, we're going to be married as soon as you finally manage to get your promotion so there really isn't much of a reason to be shy at this point." She informed him slowly, looking a bit blank suddenly. "Is something wrong?"

Shikaku gaped at her for a long moment.

Given where she was sitting, she should be able to feel _exactly_ what was wrong with him.

"Shika?"

"Do you want dinner?" He got out almost too quickly, gripping the scroll of paper he had been reading before her advent into his room. If she was ignoring that, then bringing her attention to it probably wasn't in his best interest. "I can run and get us something. Tou-san and kaa-chan aren't home, so it'll just be us."

"Why? There's a perfectly alright kitchen downstairs. I've used it before, remember." Natsumi inspected his expression closely before moving to get up and slide off him. "Anything in particular you want to eat?"

"I don't even remember what kaa-chan has."

"Mmm… I'll find us something." She tossed over her shoulder, padding her way out of his room. "Give me a bit and we'll eat."

Shikaku probably took longer than was strictly polite in following her downstairs, as Natsumi was still a guest for now until their wedding made her a Nara, but he needed the time to recover a bit of his self-control. Which wasn't helped at all when he entered the kitchen and got a very nice view of her ass, because she was trying to reach a bowl on a high shelf and was kneeling on the lip of the kitchen sink just for the boost.

Short as she was it only brought her hips up to about up to his stomach, while if he really wanted to try the same thing he could probably reach the ceiling.

Stalled between offering to grab whatever she was after and merely snagging it without asking, the logistic of the latter act sorely tempting him since he would have to reach over her, Natsumi managed to get her hands on a medium mixing bowl and dropped to the floor again before he recollected himself.

"Need any help?"

"No, not really. I was just going to mix up some chicken fried rice, if that's alright with you."

Shikaku decided a retreat was due, and slid into a chair situated next to the kitchen table. "I really was just planning on grabbing something from the market stalls set up near the main street, you know. Thanks, though, in case I forget to say it later."

"A Nara forgetting something? Please." She tossed a few vegetables into her bowl, as well as the leftover rice and chicken that had remained after yesterday's dinner. Natsumi took a few eggs before shutting the fridge with her hip. "You've got a memory on par with Minato's, and he's irritating when he's constantly reminding me of crap I've forgotten."

The wok was stored in one of the bottom cupboards, and Shikaku decided he might just forget his own name if she bent over like that again.

Hormones were a very lethal thing, as he was fast discovering. This was worse than his stupid crush on her a few years ago, at least back then he could forcibly redirect his attention.

While struggling with his automatic reaction to noticing a few bits and pieces of the kunoichi he would be marrying in as little as a year, she managed to dice up the carrots and fetched the oil out of the pantry. Natsumi also seemed to be waiting a response to whatever else she had said.

Which he hadn't heard her say as he had been distracted by the curve of her ass.

Shikaku figured this would be a long evening for him.

(ooo000ooo)

He wasn't all that surprised when she came back after checking on whatever had tossed her out of her own apartment.

It figured that was how his luck would go. There had to be some kind of catch when you snagged your childhood crush for a bride.

Shikaku did, at least, clean up the dishes from dinner and took a very cold shower while Natsumi had been gone. Thankfully, at least, she didn't immediately straddle his lap again when she came back.

Instead, she seemed more interested in talking to him for however long she would be wasting time for.

"So, not that I'm complaining mind you, why are you spending the night if you have a new apartment to live in?" Shikaku had all of a few minutes to decide if he was going to introduce her to the Nara clan traditions a little early or figure out a way to distract her for two hours. Currently he was stalling a little on distracting her, but everything he could think of could either end really badly or really well for him.

"There's way too much drama going on there at the moment."

Shikaku blinked down at her. "Drama?"

Natsumi snorted, stretching out on the Nara's bed. "Despite what Kushina thinks, I'm sure it's not as bad as she was expecting."

The genius hesitated, one hand almost to the light switch. "Can you tell me what it was about?"

"No, for the same reason I couldn't be the one to tell Minato."

"Oh, I see what you mean about drama."

The assassin blinked, not expecting that. "Shikaku, do you know already?"

"About the jinchūriki laws and all that? Yeah. I got to wondering why you were frowning over the gift you were giving your kouhai, and why you gave it without the seals needed if you had asked me about them in the first place."

She blinked again in the sudden darkness. "You rock, Shikaku."

"And I still can't figure out why that's a good thing to you." Naras were more comfortable in the dark, and he was mostly sure that if he overstepped her boundaries she would at least tell him before getting violent.

Hopefully.

Natsumi did obligingly shift over when he padded softly back to the bed, so he would have the room to join her on it. He wasn't sure if her not questioning him on turning off the lights was a good thing or not.

Shikaku's eyes had probably adjusted before her own had the time to, since he had spent a large amount of time in semi-darkness in his life and was used to it.

The last dying rays of the sun had yet to give up the last bits of sky, meaning he had very little time to commit to a course of action. "Hey, Natsumi?"

"Mmhmm?"

"Is there any particular reason why you've been teasing me for the last couple of months? I'm not complaining, mind you, but…"

"I've been trying to get you to touch me." She rolled over so she was facing him, poking him in the chest a few times with a finger. "You're always so… so _nice_ about it, but you don't do much other than hold me if I slip into your lap. It makes a girl worry, for your information."

Utterly confused, the Nara heir bodily repositioned his fiancée so she was back to sitting astride his hips. "Worry? About _what?_ I was waiting until you said I could!"

Natsumi planted her hands on his shoulders, ghost pale eyes narrowed as they locked onto his own. "Who the hell told you to do that?"

"Ino did."

She went rigidly still. "Oh… I'm an idiot."

"Well, so long as one of us knows what's going on…" Shikaku drawled out, a little annoyed. Only a little, because he finally could allow himself to plant his own hands on the curve of her ass and wasted no time doing so. "Care to clue me in?"

There was a bit of silence, but she did eventually inform him of what seemed to be their problem. "Inoichi started poking through my head when he was all of nine-_freaking_-years-old. One of the things I would never tell a damn nine-year-old is my old sex life, such as it was. My refusal to discuss that with him until he at least had a few girlfriends himself probably made him think I was insecure about something. Which is rather pointless, honestly. This body isn't my old one, it's hardwired differently. So while I may not be the prettiest girl in the box, I'm not ugly or anything and I'm fine with that."

He now had more than enough questions for the two hours he needed her distracted for, and almost explicit permission to do something a bit more physical if he needed. "So we're blaming Ino for…?"

"Two or three months of awkward frustration." Natsumi informed him blandly. "Since I was a little worried that maybe you weren't all that attracted to me, you never did take any liberties even when I thought you really would."

From the set of her face he was willing to bet she was planning something rather mean for his teammate.

"Did you miss something poking you in the ass all the time you spent perched in my lap?"

"That's a human reaction to anything _alive_ and warm in range at our age, I'll have you know. It's the same thing behind the Hyūga twins staring at any kunoichi ass a few years ago, or Inoichi suddenly deciding to play coy with all the women in arm's reach."

Shikaku stared at her hard for a moment. "Not going into what Minato-"

"I'm denying that I ever saw that happen. Hush you."

She did look a slight bit paler, but he supposed that was appropriate since she did dote on her other old blond teammate like a sibling would.

"Question then."

"Go for it."

Natsumi sounded fairly distracted, but then again she was exploring a fair bit of his chest with her hands. Probably in an attempt to rid her mind of the previous image he caused her to think about. He was having a bit of a hard time not getting distracted himself, he had her whole lower body in his grasp.

"How do you know your body is so different from your last one?"

"Other than the obvious dimensions details? I'm shorter, I've got wider hips, and a much bigger chest. Obviously, what I would have had in my last body is a bit more compacted or stretched out in this one." She quirked him a wry smirk. "No, I haven't tried anything too kinky just yet. It was actually my hands that let me know this was fundamentally different than what I was used to. Relearning to write and carve, that is. I used to have more strength behind my old hands, and conversely these are a bit more finely controlled than I had then. Which made for awkward moments when I didn't quite have the grip I needed on a few things while this body was younger."

Shikaku's mind stalled out on the kinky bit, wondering for a split second what she was referring to trying before he got a very good idea what that might be.

It was either exploring herself or actual sex, and since he knew full well what males she normally spent her time on he was sure it wasn't the latter.

There was always the possibility he was wrong, but it was easy enough to find out if he had to know.

Planting his elbows firmly, he hauled himself a bit higher up the bed. Since Natsumi had been sitting on him she ended up on her back between his thighs at the abrupt movement, blinking up at him in slight confusion.

"Wanna find out?"

"Now?" She sounded more amused than shy or uncomfortable, smirking up at him wickedly as she made herself comfortable. "You sure you want to watch that?"

It couldn't be any worse than what he had been distracted by for the last couple months, his imagination rather stubbornly centered on her attempts to entice some kind of reaction out of him and what he could have done in return had Inoichi not told him to be careful.

Shikaku found out he could be very wrong about that. Reality bested any hormone fueled daydream in spades.

A very real Natsumi also didn't somehow disappear on him, either.

(ooo000ooo)

He woke up in the dark hour before sunrise, out of sheer habit even if he had a bit of a later night than usual.

Then wondered, exactly, how much trouble he was in. Skipping a training session the Nara clan held wasn't too much of a big deal, but two in a row would invite questions at the very least.

Natsumi ended up spending the night, because she never did get around to leaving his bed to kick Minato and Kushina out of her apartment when Shikaku was distracting her. Since she was still there, he had to either keep her asleep for the morning session or distract her a little more.

If she woke and he was gone, it was likely she would look for him and end up wandering into an active training exercise by accident.

The Nara clan's forest at night was almost instantly _lethal_ to non-clan members that wandered in there, the whole reason why the compound was set back a bit and between the Akimichi and Yamanaka clan compounds. Everyone in those three clans knew better, but Natsumi didn't. Caught between traditions and her safety rather limited Shikaku's options on what to do.

That wasn't even the tip of his problems, because his parents would be home after dawn's break to see what the hell was up with their son and heir skipping training… and it wasn't likely Natsumi would be gone before that. His father might have spent the night with the clan's beast master to help him care for the ailing and old lead stag of the deer herd, and his mother taking the opportunity to visit her sister, but they were still in the compound.

Worse of all, she was in his bed and in his arms. In a compromising position to say the least.

She didn't bother to dress herself even a bit after letting him play with her some, only Shikaku could put in a claim to be wearing a stich of clothing. Her ass was, again, planted into his hips while they lay on their sides in his bed. The bit he was sure he would probably get in trouble for was that his hands had wandered in the night, one was tucked up between her impressive rack and the other was rather firmly wedged between her thighs.

Something very _wet_ and _warm_ was distracting the hell out of him yet again.

Indecision only really lasted until something drew her slightly from the realm of sleep, either his hold on her or her own internal body clock, and removed another few options for the shadow master to use.

Her _hips_ rolled with her stretching out a bit, and with where she was positioned that wasn't very kind to him.

Shikaku also found that his self-control didn't really stretch that far when it came to his bride-to-be, and that Natsumi had nearly none when it came to him too.

(ooo000ooo)

Then his mother knocked on the door. "Shikaku-kun? Is everything alright?"

Natsumi whimpered lowly, pressing her lips into his neck and tightened her hold on him.

Not exactly the best way to put a stop to things, in all honesty. "Yeah, I'll be down in a bit kaa-chan."

"Bring Natsumi-chan down with you if you would, dear." Aikido brightly informed her son through his bedroom door, before she made enough noise to inform the both of them she was leaving them to it.

"You're okaa-san is an evil, _evil_ woman."


	9. TenTen's day out with Natsumi

**Author's Note** : The whole reason I did a missing scene was to ask a damn question, and I forgot to ask it. So, double update this week!

Does anyone really want more bedtime stories? They'll probably not be about Natsumi anymore, but more like the Nara clan trains at night thing to develop the clans a little more. And, additionally, does anyone want full delves into the different clans in the first place?

* * *

><p><em>TenTen's day out with Natsumi<em>

As far as she could see, TenTen rather lucked out with her genin team.

It wasn't the best team ever, but it also didn't seem like they would end up as a bad one either.

Hyūga Neji might be a little _too_ pretty to possibly be human, but she was somewhat sure that was just because of his clan. The guy was practically perfect, as far as being shinobi was concerned. The fact he was stiffer than a kunai and about as conforming as a steel sword was just something she had to learn to tolerate. For those that got caught up in his pretty face and nearly perfect hair, they were almost all turned off due to the boy's arrogance and superiority streak he put no effort into concealing.

Rock Lee, though he might take his hero-worship of their jōnin-sensei a bit too far, was at least very polite. If he did end up copying their sensei to the point of trying to become a mini clone of the ninja, well… TenTen was sure there could be worse things Lee could've fixated on. Hopefully he'd end up as a less intense version of their team's jōnin team leader.

They worked well together, mostly, and TenTen decided that her genin team could be different shades of awesome if she really wanted to help her fellow genin actually click somehow.

Therefore she rather liked, or at least tolerated well, her team.

The point she really wanted some help on was their jōnin-sensei.

TenTen didn't really know what to make of the man, honestly.

Maito Gai was… probably a few arrows short of a full quiver. He was an impressive jōnin taijutsu master, a veteran of the Third Shinobi War, _and_ impressively well connected somehow, true. He was also clad in enough green spandex to pop an unwary person's eye out and seemed to have no other volume other than '_booming loud shout_' sometimes, but he _was_ a jōnin shinobi and therefore allowed his quirks.

On the other hand, the _YOUTH!_ thing was a little… weird. Not to mention the bowl cut, orange leg warmers, or what she was sure were impossibly shiny teeth.

The man was also polite to a fault, and how he could be so and a ninja at the same time confused her. Even Hatake Kakashi-sama, her jōnin-sensei's apparent best friend, was nearly a complete _asshole_ as far as the young kunoichi could see.

Why they were friends was beyond her ability to understand. She attributed most of it to the last war and ignored it for the sake of her sanity, truth be known.

She had nearly had the jōnin pegged down, mostly, then he would do something that threw her off a bit.

Like a few days ago, when he took her aside and asked if she wanted him to answer any questions she may have about a kunoichi's role in shinobi life.

To be perfectly honest, he actually picked her up and moved them over three clearings from their team's usual meeting spot _then_ asked. TenTen appreciated his tact, his voice easily carried pretty far and the topic wasn't something she wanted either Neji or Lee to know about it being discussed. However, he was _male_ and she wasn't really that comfortable with the idea of asking him her questions.

TenTen didn't have a whole lot of options, though. She was civilian born, which she had long since learned to mean there weren't any shinobi in her immediate family who could help her if she had questions or issues. That also meant she wasn't quite as lax as most ninja raised kunoichi about gender roles or her modesty, something that would just take time to become comfortable in spite of if ever talking about the topic with her jōnin-sensei again.

Since Gai-sensei had shown a sense of tact that had thrown off her understanding of him, she explained that if she had to ask she would appreciate if he could find a kunoichi for her to ask questions of.

He didn't take offense, which she hadn't been worried about in the first place, or even reminded her there may be times she couldn't put off talking to him about something, which she knew full well, but simply informed her that could be possible if she minded waiting a few days before getting any answers to her questions.

TenTen had agreed, mostly because he was being understanding about her hang-ups about talking to him over this topic… and she wanted to see what kind of kunoichi her sensei would know well enough to ask for something like that.

It was horrible, mean, and a little petty of her. Gai-sensei was a jōnin shinobi of skill and some renown, he probably knew a lot of women both in the shinobi corps and outside it.

Her curiosity wouldn't let it rest, though.

Worse, when the team met up this morning, they only did an hour of training before Gai-sensei announced they were going to meet someone. That had made TenTen slightly self-conscious about the whole thing.

Gai-sensei was pretty fanatical about training, and to cut it short just for her insecurities…

Then the kunoichi his sensei somehow knew ambled into the winter-barren Training Grounds Sixteen.

Long-sleeved Nara clan jacket, a katana slung across her back, and mismatched eye coloring?

How did Gai-sensei know the Nara clan's Lady?

"Gai."

"Sensei! It is always a glorious day when you grace me with your Youthful presence!" He boomed out while almost _bouncing_ in place, gifting the mildly amused kunoichi with a fond and shiny grin.

TenTen nearly face planted in the dirt. This was Gai-sensei's _jōnin-sensei?_

"And, as always, if you grow any damn more I'll remove your bloody kneecaps." Natsumi informed him just as cheerfully, if not as loudly. "You're tall enough, stop it."

The shinobi's grin grew slightly, oddly enough, but then he made it all the stranger when he actually moderated his tone a little for his next statement. "Sensei, have you given any thought that maybe we're not growing more but you might be shrinking?"

She came to a complete stop, staring at the taijutsu master she had apparently trained. "…Gai, would you care to play tag with Tsuyoshi? It's been so long since he had a nice chase… I think a few hours will do you good."

"Err… sensei-"

"Too late, I'll take care of your gakis for you. Have a nice run."

In a move TenTen missed entirely, the Nara slit her thumb somehow and slammed a hand on the ground. The billow of smoke was easily dissipated in the open air of their training grounds, and the massively _large Leopard_ blinked up at Gai first then back at his Summoner. "Natsumi-sama?"

"Play a little with Gai for me, Tsuyoshi. He's being naughty." The kunoichi informed him with the pleasant if bland tone the Nara clansmen were well known for. "Off you go."

The Leopard, Tsuyoshi, sniffed at her lightly then turned a very frightening look on Team Ten's jōnin-sensei. His muzzle barring a large number of rather long and sharp teeth as he probably tried to grin at the very green shinobi. Gai-sensei, who hadn't lost his grin at all, beamed back before bolting with all the speed he had, a few hundred pounds of very large feline hot on his heels.

"He's been hanging out too much with Kashi-chan… or Ibiki." The kunoichi mused almost to herself as the strange duo left the clearing, closing the gap between her and the three genin. "Hello Team Ten. I was really only supposed to take TenTen-chan for the day, but apparently you're all coming with me."

"Natsumi-sama." Neji greeted her politely, as if she hadn't summoned a massive cat to chase off their jōnin-sensei. "May I ask why you are here?"

"Nope. And seriously, Ne-chan, you know better."

TenTen _gaped_ at the gall the kunoichi had to call her prickly and prideful teammate that, then about passed out when the young Hyūga grimaced and obediently rephrased his greeting.

"…Sumi-ba-chan, it is good to see you again."

"What the _hell?_" She blinked at the strangled sound of her own voice, but even if she hadn't intended to say anything the sheer weirdness of what was going on kept her talking. "No, seriously. What. THE. _HELL?_ _How_ do you know her, Neji-san? What was _that?_ With the cat?"

"Technically, it was a Leopard. They don't like being called cats." The Nara's Lady interjected lightly with a shrug, pressing the slightly bleeding digit into her mouth.

Her usually overly formal and very self-contained Hyūga teammate actually _sighed_ when the older kunoichi seemed content to leave it at that. "There is this thing, you see. It is called the twisted family tree, and by that she is my ba-sama."

"Chan."

"My ba-chan." Neji repeated, only slightly irritated at the correction. "I tried to stop calling her that when I joined the academy, she has since refused to allow it."

Which didn't really help TenTen out much, truth be known. Besides, she was pretty damn sure there wasn't any connection between the Hyūga clan and the Nara one other than the fact they were both Konohagakure no Sato shinobi clans. At least something like that would've been taught in the academy, or even mentioned once or twice.

"About the twisted family tree, by the way, your team has just made it worse." Natsumi informed him with a measure of gravidity the younger kunoichi didn't understand.

"How? It has been less than a year."

"Lee-kun's an _orphan_." She shrugged, tipping her head back and rolling off more information that just confused the poor girl. "By the same jōnin-sensei legal ward rights that started this whole mess, Lee-kun would actually be Gai's legal son. Then since Gai became an orphan before the age of sixteen and while he was my principle student, it makes your teammate my grandson. By a different set of shinobi legal rights, you all are siblings in a way and therefore my own grandkids that way too. Which doesn't take into account the other, thankfully only semi-legal, links the Hyūga clan still has to the rest of that twisted mess _and_ the rest of us."

TenTen blinked at her, at the suddenly very pale Neji, then turned to look at her other teammate.

Who, she realized, had yet to make a sound since the kunoichi strolled into their training grounds and effortlessly chased off their usually over protective jōnin-sensei.

Rock Lee was staring at the Nara with very, _very_ shiny eyes. "Baa-sama?"

"I'd prefer chan, kiddo." Natsumi informed him calmly, as if she hadn't just explained how he, and the rest of them, got adopted into the strangest legal mess TenTen had ever heard of. "You can even call me Sumi-baa-chan if you want. Come on, there's still a few more the lot of you should meet."

(ooo000ooo)

Nara Shikamaru, recent graduate of the academy and fellow genin, listened to his mom explain what they had guests over for.

Then the Nara heir sighed heavily at Neji, who strangely went even stiffer. "You _had_ to make it worse?"

"It wasn't _my_ fault. It's Gai-sensei's."

The younger Nara had his mother's very strange and pale eye coloring, but physically tanner and male if shorter due to his young age, and he huffed before shaking his head at TenTen's usually prickly teammate.

Neji acted as if he was slightly ashamed, in a very stiff Hyūga way, _and it wasn't even his fault._

She was in the middle of wondering when the hell the world would make sense again.

They were standing in the Nara clan head's home, apparently discussing a semi-fictional family tree. Neji was treated more as a distant relation than a guest, in a clan that wasn't the _Hyūga_ one, and apparently the rest of Team Ten had the relations to not be closely watched for being in a shinobi clan compound. This had apparently been going on for _years_, both Neji's treatment by the Nara clan and said fictional family tree.

Lee was of no help, he was way too dazed and daydreaming about something. Probably waiting for the moment he could ask Gai-sensei if the whole semi-legal family tree thing was true.

TenTen wondered if this was her punishment for wondering about her sensei's possible love-life. Instead of maybe a kunoichi he was sweet on or another friend of his, she somehow managed to get his jōnin-sensei who decided to adopt them all.

"Whatever, want to play a game of shogi?"

"Maru-chan… be nice and take your other nephew along." Natsumi informed her eldest son cheerfully, balancing the five-year-old Shikaina on one hip as she beamed at him. "I've got to talk to my granddaughter. Shoo."

TenTen was a little sad to see the littlest Nara didn't have her mom's unusual eye coloring. After you got used to it, it was kind of cool.

"You get way too much amusement out of that thing, kaa-chan." Shikamaru informed her drolly. "One might think you sit around and plot out how to snare the rest of the village up in that mess."

"I do no such thing, and you know it. I merely ensure when we get new members they know where they fall in it."

"Which means you sit there, plot it out, and cackle over it."

"Very true. Hey, take your imouto with. She's due for a nap." The elder Nara set the little girl down, who faithfully tottered over to her big brother and snagged hold of his hand. "I'll send Akira over to fetch you when I've got lunch made if we're too long."

"Fine." Gesturing for Lee to follow, the Nara heir led his little sister and Neji off into what seemed to be a study. "Come on, they're going to talk about girly things."

"Yes, because katanas are _so_ girly." Natsumi spoke loud enough for her voice to follow her children, and apparently her grandkids. "Come on, TenTen-chan. You look like you could do with some tea."

Meekly, she did. Aware that demanding answers from the jōnin probably hadn't been the best impression she could have given, and wow would that be embarrassing to recall later, the young kunoichi just slid into one of the Nara's kitchen chairs and watched her apparent grandmother make tea.

"The twisted family tree thing is only as real as you want it to be, to be truthful." Natsumi informed her without ever turning to look at her, taking down a canister of tea leaves from her cupboards. "It's less of a real thing and more of a very technical, if slightly legal, joke. Most of the connections you'll come across are all only there in case of the worse, like mission injuries that render you unable to decide for yourself. That way there will always be someone with a vested interest in ensuring you have the best of any options. For you, so long as Tatsuo-san is still alive, I'm not really your baa-chan."

TenTen would never admit how relieved she was to hear that. "Ano… you know my tou-san?"

"Yes, he and my kenjutsu shishou made my katana." She placed a pot of green tea on the table and gave the younger kunoichi a cup. "You might have heard of me before, because I knew you well before Gai asked me to do this."

It really only took a few moments of thinking about it, because this was a slightly notorious kunoichi who was gossiped about a lot and her dad had only made one katana for the Hatake clan she wasn't too sure who owned at the moment. "You were the honorable Hatake Sakumo-sama's student?"

"Yep, which is where the family tree joke started from. While I was taicho's student he and Eri-kaa-chan had Kashi-chan, and he asked me to help her out a bit while I was still learning from him. Long story short, we used the ninja student-ninja master legal tie in a way that wasn't strictly legal at the time. That created a bit of a loop-hole when the actions I took on the Hatake clan's behalf were confirmed by the clan head later on. Who, at the time, had been deployed when I stepped in as the senior kunoichi of the clan even if I was actually of the Nara one legally."

That did explain why both she, her son, _and_ Neji treated it as if it was a real thing. It _could_ be, if needed. Like any tool, it was just one more in the arsenal shinobi kept sharp to protect themselves. A very strange one, but useful nonetheless.

That also meant… "Can I see your katana? Please?"

Natsumi hadn't set it down when she entered her own home, and TenTen only belatedly realized she had been waiting for her to ask. That was long after she finally managed to see the full blade, the only chakra absorbing katana her father had ever made.

Unless Kakashi-sama decided to try his hand at helping her dad forge one, there would never be another.

With her own chakra she tested the blade, feeling how it would respond. It passed through the metal as if it was just part of her own arm, slowed only by the distance it got from her chakra network. TenTen had expected it to show wear that said it's wielder was a suiton jutsu user at the very least, which made her wonder if she could feel rust developing with her chakra senses or not, but it really only felt like a newly forged blade to her. "That is _so_ cool."

"If Aina-chan decides she doesn't want to use it, it'll go back to the Hatake clan's armory after I'm gone. In that eventuality, though be aware she might just decide to use it, Kashi-chan would accept that you have a right to it and might let you use it for your own kunoichi career. Taicho helped your otou-san forge it, after all."

"I couldn't-"

"I insist." Natsumi spoke over her, looking slightly bored really. "Maru-chan decided he didn't like the feel of it, and that leaves only Aina-chan as any possibility I can pass it to my children… so far, at least. If you can and want to, and it's unclaimed, there isn't a reason for you not to."

Slowly returning the unblemished katana back to it's sheath, TenTen thought about that before insulting her hostess with another refusal. It _was_ only an eventuality, if her rather cute daughter didn't want to use the sword. In that case, it would be a crime to allow the blade to sit unused for another generation or two before someone else picked it up. "Alright."

Rolling her eyes, the older kunoichi reached into one of her chūnin vest pockets for a slip of paper. "Alright then, now for the not so fun stuff. Questions? Gai said you were rather firm that you had some."

The younger was instantly curious about the seal, which was probably for privacy in a household with a few young shinobi within. Fūinjutsu was something she had been hoping Gai-sensei would introduce to the team, but he seemed more intent on getting their teamwork up to snuff. Since this was his jōnin-sensei, and she was both an fūinjutsu and kenjutsu mistress, that mean he _had_ to know some.

However, that was for another time.

"One of tou-san's other customers made it sound as if I might be taking seduction missions for the village right after grad-"

"No."

TenTen blinked at the abrupt answer, peering up from her teacup hesitantly. "That's _it?_"

"Seduction is actually a branch of the ANBU black ops Divisions. They handle any Seduction missions, and those are all volunteers. Unless you really want to, you'll never do a seduction mission." Natsumi bit her lip and thought about it a bit more, then shrugged. "The only time any kunoichi could be pulled for something like that is if the jōnin-sensei and or team leader said okay, and those missions that need a non-ANBU agent for are usually child molester assassination requests. For bait, honestly. Even then he, she, and or it would never get close enough to touch you even if Gai gave a green light to use you. And that would only happen if every genjutsu user who could hold a realistic image for two seconds had all been mysteriously killed off or in the middle of other missions, and every kunoichi who could even remotely fit the description of the needed bait were dead or spoken for. Which wouldn't happen at all, because Gai can use genjutsu himself and would probably go in your place anyways."

"Oh." She internally vowed to do something to make up for her initial and rather bland indifference to her jōnin-sensei. Gai-sensei was _awesome_.

"We've come a long way since the Warring States Era, TenTen-chan. You will _not_ have to do anything you're not physically ready for just to survive. That was the reason the Hidden Villages were founded, so we can protect each other."

The Nara's Lady didn't seem to care if TenTen needed a few minutes after that, she actually seemed rather content just to have company as they drank tea.

"So… the, uh… the birth-control…?"

"Tsunade-sama's hormone controlling pills? Yes, they will keep you from bleeding every month unless you take the counter dose or let them wear off yourself. So long as you take one about every three days, you probably won't get pregnant either."

"_Probably?"_

"Well… I know a kunoichi that should have been on it and got pregnant twice before she had her ability to have kids removed. But Tsume isn't exactly the best at recalling when she has to take her meds." Natsumi informed her with a smirk. "Kuromaru's better, actually, and he's not even human."

TenTen blinked up at the older kunoichi. "Who's not human?"

"The alpha of the Inuzuka clan's ninkin, Tsume and her nin-dog Kuromaru."

"Oh… ah, okay."

"There is a bit of risk to it, so you know." She tacked on after another moment. "The longer you're on the hormone therapy treatment, the greater the likelihood you might have issues conceiving when you want children. For most kunoichi, that's not a problem because they don't have specializations where they risk their body's integrity. Close-combat kunoichi tend to have even more trouble, even I did and I'm more short-to-mid range than close-quarters. I actually know a kunoichi, retired tokubetsu jōnin tai user, who could only have one due to the hits she took to the abs. She's perfectly happy with her one, but you should plan accordingly and take only the risks you know and accept the consequences of."

How do you plan for something you didn't even know if you wanted? TenTen frowned thoughtfully, but all she really wanted from life was to learn some fūinjutsu and maybe spar with this kunoichi using katanas one day.

"TenTen-chan, you don't have to ask all your kunoichi questions today. Your sensei and tou-san can get a hold of me if you need me, and we could even make this a weekly or monthly thing." Natsumi informed her after they had finished off the tea. "Gai should be nearly done tiring out my Leopard, and the boys will be hungry soon. Is there anything you need an immediate answer to right this moment?"

"Err… my…" Embarrassed, the younger kunoichi crossed her arms over her chest.

"Are they bouncing?"

"Yes?"

Natsumi looked rather amused. "Right, I'll have to take you shopping then. Let me feed the horde, and inform Gai that I'm taking you, then you and I can go get a few more kunoichi and make an afternoon of it."

"Sorry…"

"For what?"

"Taking up your time? For being difficult with sensei and making you step in because you're a kunoichi and he's not?"

The Nara snorted at her as she started peeling up the paper she had placed on her kitchen table. "Please. Any female worth her salt wouldn't talk to Gai about feminine issues unless he was the last option available. Since he's not, you did what I'd expect any young woman to do. Besides, I was the one that asked your tou-san to send you over to us and I _told_ him we'd take care of you. You wouldn't make me a liar, would you?"

"You… are… no liar, sensei! Yosh!" Gai-sensei _panted_ out as he stumbled into her kitchen, an equally tired Leopard slinking after him. "That was… very fun, my friend. We should most… definitely do this again… to keep us both Youthful!"

Tsuyoshi gave a gravely purr as he staggered into the shade offered by the table. "Let's, Natsumi-sama doesn't get in very many fights anymore."

"I'm retired, thank you both." Natsumi interjected, pulling a bowl out of somewhere and filling it with water for the massive feline. "I don't do more than spar on occasion. And murder unholy masses of paperwork, but that's a given."

Gai allowed himself to slump into one of the kunoichi's chairs, seemingly noting TenTen only just then. "MY MOST YOUTHFUL STUDENT! HAS-"

"Inside voice, Gai."

The jōnin shinobi coughed. "-has sensei aided you as you needed?"

"Mostly, sensei."

Natsumi poked her jōnin-sensei in the head a few times even as she handed him a glass of water. "I want her to visit once a month, and I'm still stealing her for the rest of the day to take care of one last thing. Your other students are with Maru-chan and Aina-chan, and Lee-kun _is_ going to be taught the Mesuji style taijutsu. Yes?"

"Hai, sensei."

"Minato will put this down as a D-rank mission, replacing TenTen-chan with Maru-chan. Have him pay you as such around dinner."

Gai frowned, a little confused. "Sensei?"

"You're watching my kids, more specifically Aina-chan, while I help TenTen-chan."

"We could do no less, sensei!"

"Damn straight."

TenTen snickered slightly. Maybe, if she ever got jōnin as a rank, she might possibly get her own genin team and introduce them to her own jōnin-sensei. This was fun to watch.

Lee, probably alerted by their jōnin-sensei's loud voice, practically burst into the kitchen with the energy he had been curiously missing for most of the morning. "SENSEI!"

"INSIDE VOICES, please."

"My apologies, Nara-sama…" the genin trailed off when he got a very pointed look from the retired jōnin, "err… baa-chan. Sensei? Is it true?"

Gai glanced between his old jōnin-sensei and his student and lowered his glass. "I take it you found out about the family tree then, Lee-kun?"

TenTen's bushy browed teammate buried his face in one green clad arm, in a motion copied from when their sensei got a little over-emotional. "Yosh, sensei. But is it true?"

She had yet to figure out if that was just dramatics or if they did cry that much.

Gai gave his mini-me an overly shiny smile, a thumbs up, and a broad wink. "I am most joyous to be able to confirm it, Lee-kun!"

Natsumi leaned over to TenTen, hiding her mouth behind the back of her left hand. "He once tried to copyright that pose."

"Even better! Your most Youthful baa-chan has given permission for me to instruct you in her family's taijutsu style!"

"Eeh? Isn't baa-chan a Nara?"

"I wasn't before my marriage to Shikaku." Said Nara informed the miniature of her old genin student with a shrug. "Gai, since he was legally my ward for a few good years, has kindly agreed to keep the Mesuji style in use for my kaa-san. Since she died not too long after I was born and I prefer my katana. Now we would like you to take it into the next generation and pass it on once you have a student of your own. Or a kid, but since student is more likely to happen first…"

Lee lunged for the kunoichi, hugging her around the middle. "I will be your best grandson, baa-chan! Thank you for the faith you hold in me to carry your family's legacy on!"

"Honestly, at the moment, you're my only grandson. I have a granddaughter, but she's in Suna and I don't get to see her." Natsumi spoke, almost to the wall instead of to the genin as she patted his back with a measure of aplomb TenTen was slightly jealous of. "So since I can see you whenever I want, you're already my favorite."

She then, after bracing Lee with an arm firmly keeping him against her stomach, spun and pointed a finger in her son's face.

"Don't. _Even_. We do _not_ need another Gai-Kakashi friendship."

Shikamaru actually lost his bored look for an alarmed expression. "Okay."

TenTen pricked her metaphysical ears. Shikamaru knew _how_ that friendship happened?

(ooo000ooo)

"Actually, the only fūinjutsu Gai has is his Summoning Contract. He's got the memory for the standard patterns, but his natural creativity didn't transfer well to paper… to say the _least_." Natsumi informed TenTen as she led them to her father's forge.

Uzumaki Kushina, and how unreal was it that a newly graduated genin kunoichi was _hanging out with the Yondaime's wife_, nodded a few times. "I recall you telling me about that. Poor tree, I don't think the other half ever grew back."

"Instead, have him give you the standard patterns for now and practice tracing and using them. If you really want fūinjutsu as a specialization, and we'd love for you to pick it up honestly, something can be arranged with one of the users looking to get their mastery."

"Really?"

"I really should get mine, there's no point in hiding my skill anymore with what we did to the Uchiha clan compound, so you might just be my student in a few months." Kushina gave her a bright grin, twirling to walk backwards and either keeping track of her surroundings with her kunoichi skills or trusting the other two to do it for her. "And we'll put a few more kinks in that twisted tree."

TenTen, for all the insecurities she started this day out with, decided this had been one of her favorite in her genin career. The shopping thing hadn't really been that much fun, much to Kushina's apparently eternal disgust, but it turned out Natsumi didn't really like clothes shopping either. Instead, she used most of the time the fiery redhead had been picking out things for her to try on to pick the Nara kunoichi's brain about fūinjutsu.

Which eventually led into a few hours wasted at a paper and ink merchant both older kunoichi knew well, outfitting TenTen with enough ink and chakra absorbing paper for her to try her hand at sealing.

She did feel a little bad, because the paper and ink were expensive and they had already spent a bit of money on her in the clothing merchant's shop, but both of them had brushed her off when she tried to protest. As apparently tempting another female fūinjutsu user was worth more than a few hundred ryo to them.

Natsumi frowned suddenly, looking up to TenTen's home and her dad's blacksmith shop. "I probably should have done this before, but TenTen-chan? I need the name of whatever idiot told you that you might do seduction missions right out of the academy."

An ear-splitting _crack_ informed the younger kunoichi that the Yondaime's wife had been using chakra to walk backwards and not hit anything, because now that she was instantly irate she lost control over it and it split the cobblestones under her ninja sandals. "Who did _what?_"

"Hime." The Nara's voice was a little flat as she spoke, but the redhead did smooth her angry expression. "Obviously, that's not done anymore. Not for the last thirty years. But whoever tried to tell you that is attempting to seed mistrust or crack your faith in the village, kiddo, and we need to know."

That sounded worse than TenTen had thought it had been. She had assumed the old biddy had just been trying to scare her. While it had somewhat worked, and gave her all sorts of worries, did it really mean what Natsumi was saying?

"Oshiro Megu-san, Natsumi-sama." The choice was taken out of TenTen's hands when her dad spoke up for her. He hadn't been happy when his daughter had become upset, but the woman had been a customer at the time so he just ensured TenTen never had to deal with her again. "And may I say I am delighted my daughter has found her way to you."

"You could have told me yourself, Tatsuo-san, or Kashi-chan. We would've kept an eye out for her sooner." She rebuked gently, mock frowning at TenTen's dad. "We'll take care of it if it is anything."

"I was waiting for you to come to the shop yourself, Natsumi-sama." Tatsuo returned with a wry smirk. "So I could introduce you two."

Gaping, the younger kunoichi watched as her usually very formal dad, at least when he was dealing with customers, tease the Nara's Lady.

Apparently, Natsumi wasn't yet done tipping her world view over on itself.

A hand settled down on her head, and TenTen was distracted from her dad's conversation by Kushina kneeling down and looking her straight in the eye. "You do understand that will not happen, right?"

"Hai, Kushina-hime. Sumi-ba-chan already had that talk with me."

"Good, next time inform your sensei. It might not seem like much, or just spiteful without cause, but it might not always be. Either way, it is disruptive and dissent sowing in the kindest terms. Therefore it does need to be addressed." The Whirlpool Princess huffed, giving the back of her friend a fond if annoyed look. "You'll have to excuse Natsumi if she's being a bit suspicious or overreacting, but she really doesn't like it when someone attempts to harm her precious people. And since you're Gai's, that makes you hers as well."

It was kind of nice, actually.

Like having family in strange and weird, if high ranked, places.

"It's fine, Kushina-hime. I understand."


End file.
